140 replies to this topic

[Marauder]

When you sit down to tie your laces.

Yes, I do mostly only wear Clarks shoes and safety shoes, though, so far, never at the same time.

I have woken myself up with my own snoring.

I turn the telly off when there's nothing on that I want to see.

It's about ten years since i last wore jeans. However, I've still kept a couple of pairs in a wardrobe ... just in case.

My garage has got loads of junk, so has the attic.

Slip on shoes

[JohnM]

When your kids are looking at University to go to.

When you went to your eldest grand daughters 21st .....last year!!!!

[heartofGold]

Losing the lottery ticket and then receiving a text from your daughter the next day which says "Just found the lottery ticket in my fridge you senile old bag!"

[Saint Billinge]

Thinking the stairs are creaking when in fact it's your knees!

[Wolford6]

I still call it Emmerdale Farm. Well, it was when I last watched it.

[Saint Billinge]

I still call it Emmerdale Farm. Well, it was when I last watched it.

Been nightclubbing or is it those aches and pains waking you up from ageing!

[Wolford6]

Standard Friday night; I walk a few miles home so it's not really as if I was drinking that late. Still makes working every Saturday morning a challenge. Can't have my usual afternoon nap either; the Bulls are playing.

There's an Irish builders saying ... if you can't handle a days work after a good drink; it's time to give up work!


Supposed to snow tonight. Never mind, I'll have a sleep, then take it quietly and come home at closing time.

[Johnoco]

There's an Irish builders saying ... if you can't handle a days work after a good drink; it's time to give up work!

A favourite of my Dad and his cohorts.

[amh]

when your first born turns 26 (today) and your youngest is in her 22nd year

when the moans and groans you make are no longer (only) of the sexual nature

when in your head your still able to do it all, but your body says a big fat yer joking

when your long term memory is far better than your short term

when young people get up and offer their seat on the bus

when you don't give a stuff about any of this and you're still having a laugh, enjoying what you have, and glad you're not having to relive it all ha ha

[Old Frightful]

Ha! You're nowhere near old, mate. You remembered to buy the paper.


Didn't you?

Whilst working, I regularly walk to my van and wonder what it is I want out of it by the time I get there.

And I haven't reached 50 yet.

[Bleep1673]

When you've been doing the job so long you've done it before some of your colleagues were born

[Phil]

when you tell your teenage kids "because I say so"

[Johnoco]

when you tell your teenage kids "because I say so"

And think that's perfectly reasonable.

[hindle xiii]

When you've been doing the job so long you've done it before some of your colleagues were born

Yes, not me obviously but yes, it makes some of my colleagues appear old to me!

[tonyXIII]

It's just occurred to me that some of the pupils I have taught will be turning 50 this year.

And I'll be turning 60 soon.

[Bleep1673]

Strangely: I became a father for the first time at 46, in 2008, in April I will become a Grandfather.










Because my Partner has a 19 Year-old daughter and she is Pregnant to a male heir to the Jamaican side

[gazza77]

Getting a call from your sister to wish you "happy birthday", being asked if you got your card and not having a clue despite it only being a couple of hours since you opened the half dozen you'd recieved.

[timtum]

At the market this morning I was discussing with a customer why I never made the move ten years ago to Australia. She said that she understood; that I would miss the grandchildren.

I now struggle to put my socks on (particularly the right one as you ask).

Pretty young women now make me smile rather than phwoar.

[Bleep1673]

Getting a call from your sister to wish you "happy birthday", being asked if you got your card and not having a clue despite it only being a couple of hours since you opened the half dozen you'd recieved.

I get that call from my brother every year, and I tell him it must have been delayed in the post, because he is too tight to actually send me one, even last year for my 50th.
Thats what comes from being related to a Salford fan. Miserable Fckr

Edited by Bleep1673, 23 February 2013 - 09:24 PM.

[Bob8]

People have been citing nasal hair and going bald. I used to have nasal hair, but recently my nostrils have gone bald.

....

Pretty young women now make me smile rather than phwoar.

A very beautiful 19-year old flirts with me at work, which annoys some of the young men. However, she does it because she thinks I am old enough to be harmless.