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Futtocks

Eurovision

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Then it's up to the BBC to persuade them.

 

Last year's Eurovision winner was a massive hit all over Europe, and even went Top 10 here in the UK. It's a huge shop window. There's money to be made if it's done right.

 

I'm sure there is a middle ground between top songwriters and acts and Bonnie Tyler and Engelbert Humperdink.

 

In the UK, we seem to have decided that we can never win it and given up really trying. Looking at the winners from the last few years it's pretty obvious what style is favoured in Europe and we seem to be trying to do the opposite. Pretty much all the winners have songs written by relative nobodies on the world stage so why do we struggle so much to get anybody to write a song?

 

A lot is made of the political and favourable voting, yes it exists (we have a couple of our own) but it doesn't mean we cannot win. We've finished in the top 5 twice in the last 11 years, once with the current system of voting. We're not destined to finish in the bottom few every year.

 

I've said it once and I've said it before. If Germany can win the thing then we can win the thing.

 

That said, surely it's not hard to take away a countries vote from them. If a country has picked the same top country for the last however many years, they should be disqualified, simple as.

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It was a great show. The interval performance before the voting was a piece of mickey-taking genius by the Swedes, who were brilliant hosts.

 

A good pop song won again, despite the usual moans about political voting.

 

The UK could do better in this contest again if it really, really wanted to: just stop sending has-beens with dreary songs to represent us. If no one in this country would buy it, why would anyone in the rest of Europe vote for it? Durrr.

It was a very average pop song. We've tried has-beens, we've tried our most successful ever musical songwriter and we've tried a boy band. Bear in mind that we have by some distance the best pop and rock bands (world renowned) in Europe but they're not interested. So we're always going to struggle to pitch our second division stuff right. Oh, and the rest of Europe knows about UKIP and our general xenophobia and that won't help either.

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Occasionally, a 'name' says they'd fancy a go at Eurovision, but it never comes to anything. Too much pride to lose, if you risk finishing behind a Romanian eunuch vampire or a pair of rapping astronauts.

The BBC won't stop showing it, as long as it continues to deliver healthy ratings for several hours at a very low cost to the corporation.

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We could win it, indeed, we have won fairly recently but the point is that credible artists do not want to have anything to do with it. And I don't think the prospect of a top ten hit in most European countries is much of an incentive. The really big UK stars can do that anyway.

 

It's a telling point that the it's been going for decades and yet the highlight is supposedly Abba's Waterloo. Abba FFS. The UK talent that has previously won include Cliff Richards with Congratulations; Bucks Fizz with Making your mind up and Sandie Shaw with Puppet on a swing. Even when we took it seriously, this was hardly a who's who of British music.

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We're lucky they allowed us back after 2006.

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We're lucky they allowed us back after 2006.

Compared to Jemini, Daz Sampson is a musical god. But only compared to Jemini.

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We could win it, indeed, we have won fairly recently but the point is that credible artists do not want to have anything to do with it. And I don't think the prospect of a top ten hit in most European countries is much of an incentive. The really big UK stars can do that anyway.

 

It's a telling point that the it's been going for decades and yet the highlight is supposedly Abba's Waterloo. Abba FFS. The UK talent that has previously won include Cliff Richards with Congratulations; Bucks Fizz with Making your mind up and Sandie Shaw with Puppet on a swing. Even when we took it seriously, this was hardly a who's who of British music.

 

Why the FFS after Abba?

 

Celine Dion won Eurovision for Switzerland in 1988. She did quite well for herself.

 

Winning Eurovision isn't about credibility, it's about popularity. Two different things.

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It was a very average pop song. We've tried has-beens, we've tried our most successful ever musical songwriter and we've tried a boy band. Bear in mind that we have by some distance the best pop and rock bands (world renowned) in Europe but they're not interested. So we're always going to struggle to pitch our second division stuff right. Oh, and the rest of Europe knows about UKIP and our general xenophobia and that won't help either.

 

When Andrew Lloyd Webber wrote the UK entry, it finished a very respectable 5th. It didn't win, and didn't deserve to win, because it was a right old dirge but the UK still got lots of votes for at least trying a bit harder that year.

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Why the FFS after Abba?

 

Celine Dion won Eurovision for Switzerland in 1988. She did quite well for herself.

 

Winning Eurovision isn't about credibility, it's about popularity. Two different things.

I think "FFS Abba" is one of those "if you have to ask you'll never know" points.

 

Celine Dion is Canadian, had she been British, she'd have had no interest in Eurovision. Plus she is no better than Abba.

 

Eurovision is about popularity but it damages credibility.

 

In most countries, the winner of the equivalent of Britain's got talent enters, in the UK even reality TV stars aren't interested.When that bloke from the Darkness was asked how long he had wanted to do Eurovision his (rather too honest) reply was something like "...the last couple of weeks"

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Could be Duffy's comeback gig.

 

Only don't let her produce the recording of the song. Her second album was a disaster.

 

Failing that; Texas.

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I don't think Saint Cliff has actually won Eurovision. This list of competitors, with very few exceptions, is rather underwhelming.

You are right, he didn't win. 

 

From Wikipedia, our past winners were:-

 

Sandie Shaw - Puppet on a swing

Lulu - Boom-bang-a-bang-bang

Brotherhood of Man - Kisses for me

Bucks Fizz - Making your mind up

Katrina and the waves - Love shine a light

 

I do not like any of these "songs". I haven't even heard the last one. I don't think very many people in this thread actually own any of these tracks.

 

Why can't we be honest and admit that there has never been any decent music at the Eurovision song contest? The only "big name" who has ever performed for the UK is Cliff Richard (twice) aside from him, the acts are only really famous (if at all) for Eurovision.

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Why can't we be honest and admit that there has never been any decent music at the Eurovision song contest?

How is that being honest?

It sounds more like, "I don't particularly like disposal pop music and as I can't name any of these tunes in one they must be bobbins. Having established that this is true for the UK I have decided it must be true for Europe."

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I think "FFS Abba" is one of those "if you have to ask you'll never know" points.

 

Plain old fashioned music snobbery.

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Plain old fashioned music snobbery.

A quick google shows that the poorest member of Abba is worth $4m.

The two blokes are worth well more than $100m each.

I think they can cope.

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I enjoyed it for what it was - a bit of good fun. Of course the UK's entry was rubbish, but that's a big part of the event!

 

If we're struggling to find mainstream performers to enter why not go down the more radical route? Winnie Puuh give one good example!

Other than that, Eurovision is supposed to be about European culture, and the UK is full of talented traditional/folk singers. Why not?

Oh, and Cliff did win Eurovision. It's just that that ####### Franco fixed the voting to give his regime 'prestige'.

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Plain old fashioned music snobbery.

Not only that, but ignorance too. Abba are responsible for some of the most finely crafted pop songs of the last half a century. They are not personally my cup of tea, but anyone who knows the first thing about music and songwriting would never be so dismissive of Abba's cannon.

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Not only that, but ignorance too. Abba are responsible for some of the most finely crafted pop songs of the last half a century. They are not personally my cup of tea, but anyone who knows the first thing about music and songwriting would never be so dismissive of Abba's cannon.

If it was ignorance then I wouldn't know how many people consider Abba to be a big deal and how long this has endured.

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How is that being honest?

It sounds more like, "I don't particularly like disposal pop music and as I can't name any of these tunes in one they must be bobbins. Having established that this is true for the UK I have decided it must be true for Europe."

Not really, I watch the show every year as a kid. Couldn't name a single song that I actually liked.

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A quick google shows that the poorest member of Abba is worth $4m.

The two blokes are worth well more than $100m each.

I think they can cope.

They were very successful that's not in doubt. They just didn't produce anything that wasn't plastic.

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Not really, I watch the show every year as a kid. Couldn't name a single song that I actually liked.

 

 

They were very successful that's not in doubt. They just didn't produce anything that wasn't plastic.

 

So, to repeat, you've decided that as this music is not for you and you struggle to remember the details this must be the same for everyone in every country and, from this, conclude that no music of any worth can ever have come out of this competition.  Ever.

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There is nothing wrong with pure pop music.

 

Abba

Phil Spector

the Bee Gees

10 CC

Slade

Queen

 

All brilliant in their own way.

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The BBC won't stop showing it, as long as it continues to deliver healthy ratings for several hours at a very low cost to the corporation.

 

And here’s another part of the problem. As it stands for investment to ratings ratio, Eurovision is a pretty good deal for the Beeb. That is unless someone actually goes and wins the thing and they have to bare the cost of hosting it. It’s easier for the BBC to send an old established name and thrive on the “everyone hates us” rubbish because that’s what most people buy into and it gets the most publicity all round without any real cost. I have no doubt that if the BBC – or anyone behind the British Eurovision entries – genuinely wanted to make a credible assault on the contest then they could by simply getting in people who have listened to popular music in the past five years, but they choose not to.

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So, to repeat, you've decided that as this music is not for you and you struggle to remember the details this must be the same for everyone in every country and, from this, conclude that no music of any worth can ever have come out of this competition.  Ever.

I am pointing out that I do not like it and if you are honest, you don't either. Nobody really does. They consume it and discard it.

 

I have a fairly extensive CD collection as I am sure you do. I have exactly zero Eurovision tracks in my music collection, I doubt that you are any different. I doubt that anyone in this thread owns a significant number.

 

Some people might enjoy the contest but I don't think anyone really enjoys the music all that much. Why pretend otherwise?

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