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bedlam breakout

best catchphrase ever?

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"FFS Ray, stop talking bo**ocks..."  - Jonathan Davies.

 

"(insert any word or words here) Wigan (insert any more words here)" - Phil Clarke.

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The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy My brothers. And you will know My name is the Lord when I lay My vengeance upon thee.

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The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy My brothers. And you will know My name is the Lord when I lay My vengeance upon thee.

 

It's good -but it's not right!   Sir Roy Walker

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The Treasury will be running at a surplus in the next Patilament - George Osborne

that should be on the joke thread.

By the way, what's a patilament?

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06_Tommy-Cooper_main.jpg

 

Barry Cryer was on a talk show a couple of weeks ago.  He tells the story of going to Egypt for his hols and as they walked off the ship they had to pass a line of market stalls.  The end stall was a man selling Fez(s).  As he passed him, the Egyptian held his arms out and said 'Just like that'.  Cryer stopped and asked the market trader why he did that.  The Egyptian replied he didn't really know, but he said that every British holidaymaker that stopped at his stall put on a Fez, turned to their wife, held his arms up and said 'Just like that'. 

 Now that takes some beating.

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"Rubbish" Eric Morecombe

 

[Cough]rsenal Eric Morecombe

 

"He's Dead Jim" McCoy Star Trek

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"Keep out of the black and into the red,theres nothing in this game for two in a bed"

"Let's have a look at what you would have won"

Two of many from Jim Bowen.

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