Wolford6 Posted January 6, 2020 Share Posted January 6, 2020 Apparently, a surge of divorces are instigated in the first week of January. According to the Bradford Telegraph and Argus, the solicitor LPS has surveyed the most annoying habits a partner had during Christmas. I suspect that most of those surveyed were women: • On their phone too much - 25.45% • Not helping with the household chores -16.07% • Drinking too much - 12.95% • Spending too much money - 9.38% • Having to spend time with your partners family - 5.80% • Sleeping too much - 5.36% • Watching too much TV - 4.91% • Not showering - 4.46% • Expecting you to wrap all the family Christmas presents - 3.57% • Leaving loo seat up - 3.13% • Having to prepare Christmas dinner without their help - 2.68% • Leaving you to look after the children - 2.68% • Spoiling the children with unhealthy food/treats - 1.34% • Eating food planned for Christmas -1.34% • Not getting dressed - 0.45% • Having to spend time with your partner's friends - 0.45% Obviously, I'm not guilty of any of these inadequacies, or only guilty of those that I don't consider to be inadequacies (i.e. all of them). How about you? Under Scrutiny by the Right-On Thought Police Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stan Doffarf Posted January 6, 2020 Share Posted January 6, 2020 I'll put my hand up to the present wrapping thing. Actually I delegate all matters Christmas to her, for two very good reasons: 1. She absolutely loves it. 2. I absolutely hate it. BTW today, divorce day, is also her birthday. And when they found our shadows Grouped around the TV sets They ran down every lead They repeated every test They checked out all the data on their lists And then the alien anthropologists Admitted they were still perplexed But on eliminating every other reason For our sad demise They logged the only explanation left This species has amused itself to death No tears to cry no feelings left This species has amused itself to death Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Copa Posted January 6, 2020 Share Posted January 6, 2020 1 hour ago, Wolford6 said: Not getting dressed - 0.45% Could be awkward if they hosted guests. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gittinsfan Posted January 6, 2020 Share Posted January 6, 2020 I have had the toilet seat argument with my missus but never managed to win.As with most arguments,the yearning for a quiet life (on my part) usually gives her the upper hand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
longboard Posted January 6, 2020 Share Posted January 6, 2020 2 hours ago, Wolford6 said: Apparently, a surge of divorces are instigated in the first week of January. According to the Bradford Telegraph and Argus, the solicitor LPS has surveyed the most annoying habits a partner had during Christmas. I suspect that most of those surveyed were women: • On their phone too much - 25.45% • Not helping with the household chores -16.07% • Drinking too much - 12.95% • Spending too much money - 9.38% • Having to spend time with your partners family - 5.80% • Sleeping too much - 5.36% • Watching too much TV - 4.91% • Not showering - 4.46% • Expecting you to wrap all the family Christmas presents - 3.57% • Leaving loo seat up - 3.13% • Having to prepare Christmas dinner without their help - 2.68% • Leaving you to look after the children - 2.68% • Spoiling the children with unhealthy food/treats - 1.34% • Eating food planned for Christmas -1.34% • Not getting dressed - 0.45% • Having to spend time with your partner's friends - 0.45% Obviously, I'm not guilty of any of these inadequacies, or only guilty of those that I don't consider to be inadequacies (i.e. all of them). How about you? January is said to be the busiest time of year for solicitors dealing with divorce. The period after the summer holidays is said to be the second busiest. Any snipes posting on here may be able to confirm or contradict these alleged facts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bleep1673 Posted January 6, 2020 Share Posted January 6, 2020 Me 9 of those. My Ex? 11. Honestly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bleep1673 Posted January 6, 2020 Share Posted January 6, 2020 As I said to her, "I use the toilet with the seat up, so I put it up. You use the toilet with the seat down, so you put it down. I don't complain about the seat being down, when I want it up, so shut your mouth when I leave it up". Divorce hearing next Thursday, in Haiti. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bleep1673 Posted January 6, 2020 Share Posted January 6, 2020 I have to clean the toilet because I don't trust the little woman to operate technological things like toilet brushes. **OW** 'no'...... **STOP** Ow! She discovered.... **OW** ... This post & now I am being hit with a rolling pin c. 1982 Les Dawson. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
graveyard johnny Posted January 7, 2020 Share Posted January 7, 2020 there were loads of times when me and the mrs considered divorce, since the sticking point was neither of wanted to take the kids we put up with some terrible years, now they have grown up and flicked off we couldn't be happier. see you later undertaker - in a while necrophile Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bedfordshire Bronco Posted January 8, 2020 Share Posted January 8, 2020 On 06/01/2020 at 23:45, Bleep1673 said: I have to clean the toilet because I don't trust the little woman to operate technological things like toilet brushes. **OW** 'no'...... **STOP** Ow! She discovered.... **OW** ... This post & now I am being hit with a rolling pin c. 1982 Les Dawson. Ha ha I call my wife 'half-job' Truly awful at house work, very messy and an awful cook She is however very kind, funny and still a sort at the age of 39 so she is forgiven Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bedfordshire Bronco Posted January 8, 2020 Share Posted January 8, 2020 Just now, Bedfordshire Bronco said: I'm always disappointed when I go to rugby league games how many people are 'walkers' and not 'washers' after urinal use Ha ha.. Just got your true meaning!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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