Futtocks

Pauli Pauli gets Salford on the board on the stroke of HT, and Inu converts for Salford 6:10 St Helens.

Kick-off - let's have a look at these St Helens kids, then.

It looks a fair bit like the Lebanon strip from a few years ago. I like it!

Currently working my way through a re-watch of Lexx. Seasons 1-3 are on Amazon. I started season 4 (which is not on Amazon, but watchable on a free, ad-supported service) last night, and there is a cameo appearance by Craig Charles and Hattie Hayridge, who were making 'Red Dwarf' at the time.

Fool people into thinking you are a WW2 U-Boat captain by playing 154 games for Wigan.

Show your combined merchandising and IT wizardry by setting up an online store with a great selection of RL-themed mugs for sale... then blocking just one fan's IP address.

Save yourself the time and eyestrain of trying to identify forward passes from a non-optimal camera angle simply by declaring that they are all forward, except when thrown by the team you want to win. And you don't need to bother with exact measurements either with this method, because they are all forward by exactly 5,280 feet.

Convince friends and family that you have become a Rugby League fan by criticising anything and everything in the entire universe.

Remember also to violently kick a chair or throw one of the bottles for very little reason.

As far as celebrated tackling goes, Hannah Southwell seem to have been getting the attention on social media. Outside that, Ali Brigginshaw and Tamika Upton have edged Hannah out for player of the year awards. All RL products. Some RU switchers will of course go straight back if the Tokyo games happens at the new date, and some won't. But after Tokyo, what will be more tempting, the cash-strapped Rugby Australia or a challenging, more high-profile and increasingly-popular NRLW? And as for "the fool`s gold that signing RU players always is", I think we've seen the likes of the cream of Welsh talent grace our game for enough decades to know that Billy Boston, Jim Sullivan, Allan Bateman, Trevor Foster, Jonathan Davies, Clive Sullivan etc. were a much higher carat than iron pyrites.

High School USA (1983) From the director of... some episodes of The Dukes of Hazzard and starring Michael J.Fox, this is a by-the-numbers battle between the stuck-up preppies and the kewl free spirits and nerds. Other cast members include Dana Plato and Todd Bridges, who were still in Diff'rent Strokes at the time and yet to graduate to careers in hardcore porn and armed robbery respectively. The uber-preppie bad guy is played by Anthony Edwards, who is probably better known for later appearing in Top Gun and ER. Magnificent Eighties feather-cuts are on show at every turn, and nothing at all unexpected happens. Okay, apart from the blind Nazi teacher. He was quite fun.

Everyone knows exactly what you get with Gus.

Looking at those wing/centre combos, Gagai's not in great form, but him and Holmes have Origin experience to draw on. Coates and Lee is where I'd attack, if I was in charge of the Blues. Looks potentially brittle.

Anyone know what the current attendance rules are for Adelaide?

NEW SOUTH WALES Josh Addo-Carr (Melbourne Storm) Nathan Brown (Parramatta Eels) Reagan Campbell-Gillard (Parramatta Eels) Nathan Cleary (Penrith Panthers) Damien Cook (South Sydney Rabbitohs) Boyd Cordner (Sydney Roosters) Nick Cotric (Canberra Raiders) Angus Crichton (Sydney Roosters) Stephen Crichton (Penrith Panthers) Dale Finucane (Melbourne Storm) Tyson Frizell (St George Illawarra Dragons) Clint Gutherson (Parramatta Eels) Payne Haas (Brisbane Broncos) Luke Keary (Sydney Roosters) Zac Lomax (St George Illawarra Dragons) Jarome Luai (Penrith Panthers) Cameron McInnes (St George Illawarra Dragons) Cameron Murray (South Sydney Rabbitohs) Ryan Papenhuyzen (Melbourne Storm) Junior Paulo (Parramatta Eels) Daniel Saifiti (Newcastle Knights) James Tedesco (Sydney Roosters) Jake Trbojevic (Manly Warringah Sea Eagles) Daniel Tupou (Sydney Roosters) Cody Walker (South Sydney Rabbitohs) Jack Wighton (Canberra Raiders) Isaah Yeo (Penrith Panthers) QUEENSLAND Corey Allan (South Sydney Rabbitohs) Jai Arrow (Gold Coast Titans) AJ Brimson (Gold Coast Titans) Kurt Capewell (Penrith Panthers) Patrick Carrigan (Brisbane Broncos) Daly Cherry-Evans (Manly-Warringah Sea Eagles) Xavier Coates (Brisbane Broncos) Lindsay Collins (Sydney Roosters) Tino Fa’asuamaleaui (Melbourne Storm) Moeaki Fotuaika (Gold Coast Titans) Jake Friend (Sydney Roosters) Dane Gagai (South Sydney Rabbitohs) Harry Grant (Wests Tigers/Melbourne Storm) Coen Hess (North Queensland Cowboys) Valentine Holmes (North Queensland Cowboys) Hymel Hunt (Newcastle Knights) Ben Hunt (St George Illawarra Dragons) Felise Kaufusi (Melbourne Storm) Josh Kerr (St George Illawarra Dragons) Brenko Lee (Melbourne Storm) Edrick Lee (Newcastle Knights) Dunamis Lui (Canberra Raiders) Cameron Munster (Melbourne Storm) Josh Papalii (Canberra Raiders) Phillip Sami (Gold Coast Titans) Jaydn Su’A (South Sydney Rabbitohs) Christian Welch (Melbourne Storm)

And it's quite often cheap good stuff, instead of cheap bad stuff. Blue Nun currently sells for about a fiver, and somewhere like Lidl would have many wines at that price or less which are pretty decent.

Maybe, like Blue Nun wine, the brand just has too much historical baggage to be huge again, even for the post-modern, ironic crowd.

Not even the first in October 2020 - remember how they blew out the score very early against the Raiders? I don't know if there are any stats of chances* converted to points, but if there are, I think I know who'd be top of the list. *how to classify a "chance" for instance?

Given that Babycham is actually a perry, I'm surprised they didn't capitalise more on the cider revival of the last decade.

French's electric speed puts a smile on my face, just like Amos Roberts did. I hope he stays, but the OP makes a good point in questioning where would the Eels play him, given the attacking talent they currently have.

There's a theory that, to win a final, you have to have already been in a final. You see it in some sports where a beaten finalist shows far more nerve and composure the next time they are in that position. Okay, there are exceptions (Boris Becker in tennis, the Storm in their first GF), but the Panthers didn't look their normal selves. Kikau just looked over-excited and was trying to do too much every time, for instance. But this is a mostly young squad, and you'd expect them to be at or near the top again very soon. And next time, they may well be more like their usual selves when the big match comes around.

At least two more teams, plus later KO times (for us UK-based fans) should be possible. The Broncos women showing the men how it is done. Someone will be along shortly to complain about the attention the RU imports get. At very great length.

As regards the commentary team, Gus was always going to be pro-Panthers. I think Ray was just hoping for a more even contest and better spectacle in that first half.

Nobody's obliged to say that, but the playoffs showed off some fantastic Rugby. This Grand Final? Not a classic, but nowhere near as bad as described by those who obviously do feel obliged to rubbish the NRL at every opportunity.