HawkMan

Major Watts is on his radio to Denning, MW " we've located the house and questioning the neighbours. There's no doubt about it sir, it's hotter than a San missile. The house belongs to Fred Boiler a garage attendant in a mews in Belgravia " Denning to officer " Templar lives in a mews in Belgravia , see if you can contact him on his car telephone" Officer " no joy sir, he's out of range" Templar walks into Fred' s office in the car park. No sign of Fred, but Templar starts sniffing , he smells liniment , camphor. He notices on the table the inhaler, a quick sniff is enough to smell the camphor. Temple notices a magazine half hidden under a cushion on a chair, he picks it up, the title is ' Nuclear Physics Today'. Templar sees Fred working on a car on the other side of the car park. T " Lynn here, park my car, make a complete mess of it, block the entrance " L " why " T " just do it..go" Lynn runs over to the car, gets in and tries to park it and making a mess of it. She first parks at a bizarre angle, then stalls the car blocking the entrance. It works, the distraction needed, Fred stares at this and goes over to help , while Simon noses around the office. Templar sees a sports bag on the floor, books inside, the books are all concerning nuclear physics, and then he opens the drawer to see the horror mask, confirmation. Fred has parked the car, and he and Lynn come over. T " ah Fred there you are, the spark plugs on my car need a bit of attention, mind taking a look at it" F " okay if I leave it for tomorrow Mr Templar" T " it's okay now, but an hour ago there wasn't going to be a tomorrow . You may as well know , some lunatic was going to blow up London with an atom bomb" F " what!" T " it's true, I was in on it from the start. But we had a lucky break, found the bomb and disarmed it" F " I don't believe.......wouldn't have believed that there were such people " T " oh there are Fred. You'd be surprised, see ya Fred " Templar and Lynn walk off and into the lift. L " what was that all about?" T " dear old inoffensive Fred is the bomber " L " how d'you know" T " I'll tell you later" L " why did you tell him we found the bomb" T " because the first thing he's going to do is check to see if I'm telling the truth and we'll be following him. But first to my place we need back up from Denning " Templar and Lynn walk down the mews. Fred has opened his remote device, finger hovering over button 6. F (to himself)" walking down the mews now .......up to the door.......key in lock.....let him get well in" Templar and Lynn are indeed entering the house, Simon suddenly starts sniffing, its camphor!! T " GET OUT !!" They dive out the door, just as the bomb goes off demolishing the front of the house. Templar and Lynn run to a parked car, a bit of lock picking and hot wiring and they sit waiting . L " won't he see us?" T " no he thinks we're dead and this isn't my car" Fred in his office studies the mass of keys on hooks, belonging to the residents, he picks one, and goes over to the parked car and drives off. Templar and Lynn wait in the car, then see Fred driving out. T " down" They duck as Fred drives out of the mews, Templar and Lynn in pursuit. Fred drives to the multi storey car park where he left the bomb. Fred arrives at the roof storey of the car park. He goes over to his car he left the bomb in, opens the boot then the suitcase, the bomb is alright. Templar parks on the floor one below top storey, he and Lynn climb out . Templar motions her to stay, he softly creeps up the ramp to the top floor. Fred closes the car boot satisfied the bomb is safe. Then a look of concern on his face, he was lied to. He spins round, to see Templar, and takes the remote control out of his pocket. F " neat Templar but I've still got the power. When this red button goes down the world goes up" T " I've been wondering about that, you go with it" F " do you think I care now. Have you any idea what it's like knowing you're a genius and find yourself slipping lower and lower down the ladder with each day that passes." T " you could get back up you know " F " don't be a bloody fool, I'm marked I'm unstable. I don't think like anybody else " T " if you give me that box" F " stay where you are " T " there are people I can talk to" F " I've had enough of people talking to people about me, don't you understand that is what destroyed me. Frederick Boiler is clever, Frederick Boiler is cleverer than any of us, Frederick Boiler must be destroyed " Lynn meanwhile has not stayed put, she has found another ramp up to the top , behind Fred. She removes her clunky shoes and tiptoes up behind him. She's about ten foot behind him, Templar sees this but carries on talking. T " you could be helped " F " last person who wanted to help suggested a frontal lobotomy, thanks I rather not" T " okay kill yourself and me too if you really want, but those millions of Londoners, they've never done you any harm " F " don't you see, they're a disease, the ordinary people, against whom everyone is judged, if you aren't like them you get thrown in the ash can " T " a lot of the world's greatest talents have ended up there.....in their lifetime " F " I don't accept that.....posterity....what did posterity ever do for me. Shakespeare had someone say something about creeping and peeping about looking for a dishonorable grave. I don't want that, if I'm going I'm going in glory. Nothing and nobody will......" Lynn leaps up onto Fred's back, he struggles to push her off. Templar runs forward, Lynn is thrown to the ground. Fred drops the remote device as Templar wrestles with him. The two roll on top of each other, Fred reaches out to push the red button, Templar grabs his arm to stop him,and kicks out, Fred falls backwards over the edge of the car park, and drops ten feet onto the hard concrete of the storey below. Templar and Lynn run down to him. T " Fred..hold on...." Fred gasps out then dies T "THE BOMB!!" Templar runs back up as a little girl picks up the remote control and sees the buttons and presses them. Girl " one, two three four five..." Templar grabs the remote device. T " never press a red button sweetie, you don't know how dangerous it can be" Girl " it's just a toy" T " yes well mummy will get you a safer one" Mother " Emma...come here" The girl rejoins her mum loading shopping into her car. Later that evening Templar and Lynn check in at Claridge's hotel, a five star establishment. L " we could have had dinner at my place, but I'm not sure you'd trust my cooking " T " I'm sure an oxy - Acetylene torch makes a wonderful steak" L " it does " T " the penthouse suite here is rather special though" They enter the lift, and see the floor buttons..white , ending in a red button for the penthouse. They both look at each other with apprehensive expressions , then both smile. T " er.....I think we better walk!" THE END

Fred has driven his car up to the top of a multi storey car park. He parks it on the roof storey , gets out and opens the boot. He opens the suitcase and reaches inside the bomb, activates the device with a flick of a switch and closes it up, shuts the car boot and leaves. In Windsor Major Watts is addressing the men. MW " okay men split up and search. It's somewhere in these local streets. Move it" Armed soldiers run off in different directions to search. Fred is in a phone box talking to Denning, no disguising his voice now a madman's gleam in his eye. " the bomb is in place and armed. I've heard nothing on the radio so they'll be one last conventional explosion and then London will have sixty minutes to live. By the way the last conventional explosion will be personal " D ( exasperated) " personal, what does personal mean??!!" Fred hangs up. He checks his watch, 2 pm, he opens his remote device and then calls Templar's number, finger hovering over button 6. No answer, bomb 6 will be a little late. Back at Scotland Yard . Denning to Templar " a sound and a smell that's a hell of a lot of help. ( into phone)...well get more men on the ground Major, this is WAR. You've got 59 minutes to armageddon " T " there's more.." Denning into another phone " listen I haven't got time to talk, if the Prime Minister wants my head he can have it, that's if we get lucky in the next 58 minutes,(going ballistic)AND IF WE DON'T HE CAN KISS MY HEAD AND HIS OWN TAIL GOODBYE !!" D " now Simon, what do you mean there's more" T " whoever grabbed me knew my movements , what time I was out, when I'd be back. He used taped messages to hide his voice. Why ? Because he knew I'd recognise him. The bomber is very close to me, then there's that smell, it was like the stuff you put on a strained muscle " L " like a camphor smell " T " yes camphor, embrocation, liniment" Templar leaves, D " where you off to now?" T " to see Fred my garage man he knows everyone in that mews , he might be able to associate that smell with one of them"

Fred in his back room, views with satisfaction the bomb inside the metal room he constructed. He walks in and carefully lifts it up and takes it out into the back room, he has a suitcase opened ready. He carefully places the bomb in the suitcase and closes it. He then carries it out into the garage, and places it in the boot of the car. Back at Scotland Yard: Ld " first time he's used his own voice. Pressure is building up inside him" D " meaning what" Ld " he's destabilising like a nuclear reactor can run wild. He could press the button before the deadline " D " thanks a lot" An officer has been studying a recording of the phone call. D " anything?" Off " born south of the river, unprivileged background introverted. Can't get anything more...oh he's under tremendous stress" D " my heart bleeds for him" Meanwhile Templar and Lynn in car; the radio fades again. T " that's number 5, we turn off next exit " Lynn stops the car just after the turn off, Templar gets out and they swap places. Templar heads off to Windsor, they don't see Fred driving in the opposite direction, but Fred notices them , but looks unconcerned a determined expression as he drives back to London. Templar has stopped his car on a bridge, he and Lynn get out and view Windsor in the distance, the castle dominant in the background. T " somewhere over there I was taken, I feel it, I'm sure of it. That's the closest I can get. We need to call Denning " Denning on phone to Simon. D " where are you?" T " just outside Windsor, it's as close as I can get. We need a helicopter with a radiation sensor" D " I'm with you, I'll get the army " T " if anyone's been building an a-bomb they'll be a radiation hot spot somewhere" A couple of soldiers run across a field near to their base, a helicopter awaits, once aboard the copter lifts off. Templar to Lynn; T " something in the back of my mind " L " what about?" T " the ride with the bomber. It was a sound and a smell. I was pretty groggy remember " They look up as a helicopter flies overhead towards Windsor, they get back in the car and drive back to London. The glass window of the door of Templar's house smashes in, Fred puts his arm through and opens the door. Calmly walks in carrying bomb number 6, like the others, hand held small device complete with a small aerial attached. He looks around the lounge and decides behind the television would be a good place to conceal the device. He takes out his inhaler, sniffs it up, and flicks a switch on the bomb and leaves, then picks up the pane of glass all ready and replaces the window and clears up the broken glass. In the helicopter the sensor operator soldier studies his screen. Soldier " got something, a definite hotspot in the south west corner of Windsor. Could be any one of a number of streets " His message relayed to Major Watts on the ground. Watts in turn calls Denning and tells him. D " okay Major I want that area saturated with men on the ground " MW " sir" Ian Collier is Major Watts

Templar is showing photo of Parkinson to Fred the garage man. F " no Mr Templar can't say I've seen him hanging around here. Giving you trouble is he?" L " trouble?" T " you could say that Fred " F " are you okay miss?" L " yes fine" T " keep the photo Fred, I don't know something may turn up" Back at Scotland Yard; D " okay the bomb is in the sewers, which one?" P " I said it was in the sewers I didn't say I'd tell you which one" D ( seething)"Parkinson you either tell me which one or I'll throw away the rulebook and take you downstairs " The phone rings, Denning answers it. D " yes Denning....no nothing yet..yeah I'm sure the Prime Minister's concerned...we're not exactly euphoric about things ourselves " Another phone rings. D " officer answer that, you Parkinson on your feet...." The other phone is put on speakerphone. Bomber " you morons I can guess what you're trying to do, you're trying to find me, it won't do any good. Time is running out and even if you found me it would do no good, the bomb is programmed to go explode automatically one hour after the deadline. I want Lynn Jackson dead, I want her dead in public. And just to persuade you to be a little more adult about this, here's the biggest bang yet" Another explosion rocks London, more police and ambulances at the scene, dead bodies on stretchers. Denning glares at Parkinson; D " get this walking obscenity out of here. Book him for wilful misinformation, abetting a felony, BOOK HIM FOR BEING ALIVE " P ( shouts)" I had you going I MADE YOU SWEAT " D ( going ballistic)"GET HIM OUT !!" Fred is in his office in the car park studying the photo of Parkinson, shaking his head. He opens a drawer and tosses the photo inside, on top of the horror mask Fred is the bomber! George Cole is Fred. Fred walks out of his office and over to a car gets in and drives away. Back at the Yard; Templar and Lynn have returned. D " lunatic cost us an hour " The phone rings, it's the PM's office; D " Denning..(shouts)...NO!.....THERE'S NO WAY OF FAKING A GUILLOTINING,...... yeah I know I've got every man in the force out looking " T " I'm going to try something, it's a long shot but better than doing nothing, come on Lynn " Lynn is driving Templar's car, Simon in the passenger seat, blindfolded. They travel along a motorway. T " turn on the radio" L " look I'm not with you" T " I'm trying to feel my way back along the route I was taken this morning , I know we hit a motorway ten minutes after we started" L " how do you know it was this one?" T " it's the only one ten minutes from where I live . I heard jets overhead, this is the road to Heathrow , and that's before he turned on the radio" L" the radio that's the part I really don't get" T " he was trying to block out any tell tale signs, in fact he gave me a vital clue. It told me when we left the motorway. Are there any bridges up ahead?" L " yes one now.." T " listen " The radio fades out as the car goes under the bridge. L "I'm with you now" T " that happened five times before we reached the exit" Fred is actually further along this motorway, he leaves the road at a sign to Windsor and drives along an "A" road to Windsor. In his home Fred is in the living room, dusting his prized possessions, the scientific qualification certificates proudly framed on the wall. The radio is on, the news is broadcast still no mention of the bomb. Fred is breathing heavy, an asthma sufferer , he pulls out an inhaler from his pocket and sniffs it up, breathing easier, but he's very angry. He picks up the phone , using a handkerchief to wrap around the mouthpiece, he phones Denning direct. F " you mental cripples, you've got 2 hours to the end of the world and you still think I'm bluffing. If at 3 o'clock you've not given me what I want you'll be burned off the face of the Earth like the diseased rabbits you are. Meanwhile try this for size" He pushes button 5 on his remote device. Another explosion.....many deaths. Ambulances race to the scene, carnage as bloodied bodies put on stretchers.

T " enjoying yourself are you?" P " to each his own" T " I thought you were supposed to be off sick" P " what's it got to do with you whoever you are, and who the hell are you anyway. Ah I think I know, you're an angry parent furious I couldn't get your moronic child through their exams" T " why do you listen in on the police broadcasts " P " because I like to hear the world going to hell in a bucket " T " perhaps you like to help it on its way too" P " perhaps I do, what's the world ever done for me, I'll tell you, it's beaten me down into a stinking sub educational sweatshop force feeding facts into cretins. Man with my qualifications. Do you know what they said about me at Cambridge. I'm a genius, and all I'm allowed to do is force feed idiots" T " is that why you want to blow us all up" P " I never said that, NOW GET OUT!" T " that's what you want, you want us all to pay, especially you want Professor Loader to pay " P " Loader, he sent you did he, he hasn't forgotten me, he's still spying on me, behind this whole conspiracy against me" Parkinson picks up a fruit knife from a bowl of apples. P " well you can take this to Professor Loader from me" Parkinson tries to stab Templar, who grabs his arm, twists it behind his back and frogmarches him out the room. T " I think we better go" Gordon Gostelow is Parkinson; Parkinson is sitting on a chair in the operation room at Scotland Yard. Denning, Loader, Templar, Lynn and uniformed officers surround him. D " look at me damn you. Where's the atomic bomb. Things have changed now, you can't explode it, the game's up" P " what game, I don't know what you're talking about " T " Professor you're a sick man, surely you didn't think the government would execute Lynn Jackson just to satisfy your psychotic urges " P " I can make them do whatever I want " D ( shouts)" no you can't, not even with an atom bomb. Now you haven't even got that, you might as well tell us where it is" P " it was a marvellous idea, you've got to admit that " T " oh yes we admit it, don't we Professor Loader " Ld " er...oh yes brilliant...making the bomb on your own was genius....you've proved yourself a giant among men. We'd very much like to see it" P "don't soft soap me Professor Loader. It was you that did it. You put the mark on me, you told the whole rotten world about me and the whole rotten world believed you. I couldn't get a job making light bulbs!" T " come on now, where's that bomb" D ( losing cool) " WHERE IS IT DAMN IT!!!" P " find it....(laughs)...given you a run for your money, Admiralty Arch, Westminster Pier, then the Old Bailey. Taken a bit of starch out of you" D " where is it ?" P" ah..Haha.. find it.." T " where did you and I meet at 6 this morning?" P " if you don't know don't expect me to tell you " Templar takes a photo of Parkinson, a mugshot just taken and leaves the room with Lynn. Denning follows out into corridor. D " what's up" T " I'm not sure he's it" D " what?!...you heard him he's admitted it, he knows where every explosion has happened " T " he listens to the police radio, the one answer he couldn't get from that he didn't give" D " he's playing hard to get" T " perhaps, but if he is the bomber he must have studied my movements, there's a chance he was spotted doing that " D " ok keep in touch "

An officer approaches Templar, Off " Mr Templar sir , a part load of plutonium was stolen 18 months ago going between the research station at Harwell and the nuclear station at Winscale. The driver of vehicle that was stolen was thought to be complicit but nothing was ever proved" T " driver's name and address " Off " name Carter, we have the address " T " good man" In the operations room Denning receives a phone call. D " Denning....yes Prime Minister.." Later Templar is on his car telephone to Scotland Yard. T " we were too late on that plutonium theft. The driver Carter died 6 months ago ,they suspected would you believe radiation poisoning , what about those physicists " Loader ( phone)" the computer has come up with six names all rejected by me on the basis of incipient paranoia " T " where are they now" Denning ( phone)" one committed suicide, three are working in African countries, one we can't trace ,and the other is teaching in a crammer in Chelsea " T " that's ridiculous, man of his qualifications trying to get dull pupils through their exams " Ld " report I had to make on him is like an albatross around a man's neck, it's with him wherever he goes " D " his name is Parkinson, we've been to the school but he's not there, off sick " T " his address?" D " 66 Leinster Square W2" Templar with Lynn sitting beside him spins the car round and drives off to Parkinson's. On the radio there is the usual news, nothing about the bomb, the bomber listens, puts a cassette in his machine and records another message. Bomber " there was nothing in the news again. You're still not taking me seriously. Now people will start getting hurt" He opens his remote control device. It has seven buttons in a line , numbered 1 to 7 , 1 to 6 are white, button 7 is red. He presses button 3. Boom!! An explosion takes place at the Old Bailey courthouse, in the street outside. Denning and Loader at Scotland Yard, D " never be long enough to trace" Ld " and you can't argue with a recording, that's why he does it that way " Parkinson is at home, sitting in an armchair listening to the radio, specifically the police radio band. There's a knock on the door, P " clear off" Voice on radio " whoever planted this was out to cripple people...over.." Parkinson giggles, another knock on door. P " I told you, clear off" Templar breaks the door down and marches in.

Professor Loader marches into the operations room at Scotland Yard and up to Denning. Ld " this had better be good I was enjoying my holiday " Commander Denning fills him in, D " he's given us a simple choice, London or the girl" Templar and Lynn arrive; Loader arms outstretched greets them, Ld " Lynn what are you doing here?" D " she's the girl " Ld " she also happens to be my daughter " D " Jackson?" L " it's my married name" Another bomb goes off ar 10 o'clock. Police and ambulance arrive at Westminster Pier, the device strapped to the walkway of the wooden pier. An officer on the scene contacts Denning. " yes sir, it was definitely bigger than the first" The phone rings in Scotland Yard, an officer transfers call to speakerphone, everyone listens. Bomber " you better believe me, it going to get worse. That's 2 down and 5 to go, and number 7 is the big one ". Templar Lynn and Loader are walking along a corridor within Scotland Yard. T " you are the psychologist responsible for rejecting unstable scientists for government posts?" Ld " yes" T " so someone you rejected is hitting back at you through your daughter. Is that a hypothesis you'd accept " Ld " yes I would " T " but why do it this way, why not simply kill you, or your daughter. Is there some sort of psychological pattern to all this" Ld " yes, it's the classic imaginative paranoid, he wouldn't want to kill me that'll be too painless for me , what he wants is my suffering through the death of Lynn " T " what about the way he wants her to die " Ld " Templar please..." L " daddy tell him" T " it's very important we know everything about this man, is the way he wants her to die a part of this pattern?" Ld " yes it's part of a paranoid fantasy the man's been building up for years. He wants it ritualistic, formalized, in the presence of millions, and with his hatred of humanity he wants it on the conscience of millions. They save themselves by a sacrifice " T " how many physicists have you rejected on the basis of incipient paranoia " Ld " can't be many, half a dozen perhaps " T " can you recall them?" Ld " not offhand I've interviewed hundreds of scientists. I could go through my files " T " no time, anyway that kind of information will be in the government data banks" At the end of the corridor is a uniformed officer. T " officer, take Professor Loader down to the government data banks. Authority of Commander Denning " Off " sir" T " and Professor let's have those names as soon as the computer spits them out" Frank Gatliff is Loader.

In the underground car park under Templar's home, Fred the garage man whose job includes looking after the residents vehicles, enters his office at the far end of the car park, switches the kettle on to start another shift, when suddenly a car horn blares out, non stop, Fred rushes out and runs over to Templar's car, Simon is slumped over the wheel asleep, resting on the horn button. F " mr Templar sir, are you alright " T ( awakes) " what the hell....what's going on" F " easy does it Mr Templar " Templar staggers out of the car, T " god I feel odd.....maybe that lobster I had last night " In Fred' s office Simon sips tea. T " I had this dream Fred, a nightmare " F " never known a nightmare that could stand up to a cup of my tea" T " hope you're right, there was this maniac" Simon notices a card sticking out of his jacket top pocket, it reads, ' tell your friends in high places I wasn't bluffing. I get what I want or London blows up" At New Scotland Yard Commander Denning, head police officer of London is in his office with Simon. D " our card came this morning first thing, you know what I usually think of you and Special Branch business, but I need every man I can get, you're in" T " there was no way to keep me out" D " I've seen some sick messages from terrorists but this is the sickest" T" what does he want?" A police officer pops his head into Denning's office, "There's no one in the office at Harwell sir, too early " D " well dig them out at home" Templar and Denning go into the main operations room. Denning shows Simon a photo. D " he wants that girl executed! He wants it done publicly in Hyde Park, he wants it on tv and radio, and if it isn't done he'll explode the bomb remotely " T " I'll say he's sick, we can always put blanks in the guns" D " he's thought of that, that's how he wants it done" Denning shows Simon a drawing the bomber has done ....of a guillotine D " try faking that. This lot landed on the Prime Minister's desk at 7 this morning. The bomber has given us until 3 this afternoon to set up the execution. Until we broadcast his demands on tv and radio he'll set off various explosive devices around the city on the hour every hour. What's more each one will be bigger than the last. It's so sick it could just be a hoax" T " it's no hoax, that bomb was real" D " why should he show you?" T " perhaps he knows all about me, knows I have a physics degree, and more importantly I have a lot of influential friends " The phone rings Denning picks it up and listens, and puts phone down. D " small explosion on Admiralty Arch, nobody hurt" The clock reads 9 am, T " right on the button " Another phone rings, a police officer picks it up, listens and places receiver in speakerphone device, the bomber's voice is heard. The bomber, identity unknown is holding a telephone receiver up to his tape recorder, a precorded message again in the phoney German accent. Bomber " that's the first, you've got six hours left" Donald Houston is Cmmdr Denning; Templar " any plutonium missing?" Denning " we're checking with Winscale and Harwell" T " what about unstable physicists" D " we're getting in Professor Loader, chief scientific screening officer to the government. He knows more about nutty scientists than anyone in the country " An officer comes up to Denning, D " well?" Off " a helicopter has just picked up Professor Loader sir, he was on holiday in Cornwall " T " our only other lead is the girl. Who is she?" D " young sculptress , gifted, name of Lynn Jackson " In Lynn Jackson's sculpture studio she is at work, using an oxy Acetylene torch on a metal figure she's constructing. Templar tells her the bad news. L " HE'S GOING TO WHAT!!!" T " sorry there's no other way of telling you other than straight " L " who is he, what is he" T" we were hoping you could tell us" L " I don't know any crazy physicists " T " no rejected suitors?" L " there isn't anybody. My husband died last year and since then I've put all my energy into my work" T " no enemies at all?" L " well my father wasn't best pleased I gave up finishing school and the debutante circuit and married a man who worked with his hands. ( smiles) but he forgave me when I became mildly famous . It's a nightmare isn't it " T " it's a nightmare, well if anything does crop up let us know" L " hang on...you're not leaving me to bite my fingers down to the knuckles...it's my head on the block if you pardon the expression, and where you go I go" Anouska Hempel is Lynn Jackson.

10. The Armaggedon Alternative ( in depth) It's 6am as play boy and crime fighter Simon Templar drives his Jaguar XJS into the underground car park under his London mews house. He parks it and walks towards the lift to get to street level. Standing waiting at the lift door Simon reflects on a successful evening out with a beautiful model. The lift door opens, standing in the lift is a man wearing a hideous looking mask, a Halloween horror mask , holding a gas canister. The gas pours out and Templar collapses. Templar awakes, sitting in the passenger seat of his car, blindfolded and his hands tied. T " what is this, mystery tour economy class " The unseen driver places a cassette tape in the car player and a ridiculous almost comic Germanic voice is heard , obviously phoney. Man " I mean you no harm I want to show you something " T " it had better be good " Man " and now a little music" The driver switches the car radio on, Templar puzzled can hear something odd, the driver is sniffing a lot, and there's a smell! A little later the car pulls into a normal suburban street and into a driveway of a semi detached house and into a garage. Templar hears the car door open, the driver gets out and then opens the passenger door. Man " please get out of the car, don't try anything I have a gun" Templar steps out , the blindfold removed. T " I think I prefer the blindfold on" Templar not impressed by the ugly mask. The man has a tape recorder strapped over his shoulder, he presses a button on it, again we hear the fake accent. Man " walk forward, through that door " Templar does as instructed and into a chamber, bare except for a large metal construction. Six foot high, long and three foot in depth. The metal box like container has a window in it. Templar looks through it, and sees a small rectangular box with wires and tubes and flickering lights in it. Next to it is a metal cylinder, the whole container/ construct is lead lined. T " my god!" M ( taped voice)" that's right it's an atom bomb, big enough to blow London into ashes. The cylinder contains the plutonium with which I shall arm the bomb, one half in the cylinder, other half in the device already. Kept apart they are harmless, but brought together they achieve critical mass and the result is all the horror of a nuclear explosion. " The bomber picks up a remote control device, about the size of a tv device, opens it to reveal buttons. Bomber " with this device I can detonate the bomb from up to a hundred miles away, the explosive lenses drive the plutonium halves together and the city is destroyed by hell on Earth. And that is precisely what will happen unless my demands are met " T " what demands " Bomber " you'll be notified shortly Mister Templar, but now sleep " The bomber sprays more gas from the cylinder he picks up from a table , and Simon collapses. Ian Ogilvy is Templar.

7. YESTERDAY'S HERO Roy Gates released from jail in Germany after serving 10 years for terrorism is determined to see his estranged son against the wishes of his ex wife. Templar and Gates were on an unofficial mission for the British government trying to free a diplomat from Yemeni terrorists way back. The mission failed , Gates was captured by the Yemenis, Templar escaped, then years later Gates presumed by all to be dead was part of the Beider Meinhoff terror group committing crimes. Gates claimed that after being abandoned by the British government he was rescued by an East German from the Yemenis but the price was to train the German terrorists. Now 10 years later he's back in England and determined to avenge himself and kill the person responsible for the original mission failure, that cost him 10 years and an arm. Ian Hendry, Annette Andre and Gerald Flood in this episode. 8. THE POPPY CHAIN The sister of a friend of Templar's dies after a heroin fix, the heroin itself has been poisoned. The girl's father, an ex General from WW2 is determined to track down the pusher. General Platt tracks the pusher to his home, forces him to reveal the whereabouts of the drug gang smuggling in the heroin, but is then bashed on the head by the pusher's wife. Reluctantly from his hospital bed Platt hands over what he has learned to Simon, who picks up the trail and infiltrates the gang and heads for Marsielle to face the drug Baron responsible for this poisonous heroin. Platt determined to help Templar releases himself from hospital and goes to France to face Scorbesi the Baron and an ex WW2 colleague, now though on opposite sides. In a farm outside Marsielle Templar and Platt meet , Templar under cover as Frank Rickman, the London drug dealer who buys the heroin, and together he and Platt have a fight on their hands to overcome this gang that the French police haven't been able to touch in 20 years. With "Magpie" presenter Jenny Hanley, who is pretty good in this. 9. THE ARRANGEMENT Lady Greer Stevens is the wife of an MP ,Sir Trevor Stevens, she is cold vindictive and possibly insane, a recent patient at a clinic after a nervous breakdown, the latest in a number of such traumas. On a plane travelling with a female author, a feminist Sheila Northcott, Greer proposes they kill each others husbands, both wanting their own dead and having no motive to kill each others, a perfect crime. Sheila angry at her TV presenter husband and his feminist bashing comments on his show, agrees with Greer to the arrangement. But Sheila momentarily angered was joking, Greer certainly wasn't, and after killing Guy Northcott puts pressure on Sheila to carry out her side of the bargain. Templar a friend of Sheila gets involved when Greer kidnaps Sheila's sister to force her to kill her husband. Sir Trevor besotted by Greer continues to refuse to believe his wife wants him dead and doesn't help matters by giving Greer alibis, false ones to cover up her wrong doing. A tricky situation for Simon to unravel. Caroline Seymour excels as the dangerously loopy Greer. My second favourite episode.

4. ONE BLACK SEPTEMBER Israeli Mossad agents hire Templar to track down a Black September terrorist in London who is on the run from his old comrades. Three Black September commandos arrive to track down Hakim before the Israelis get him. Hakim has a girlfriend who he wants to marry and she persuades her father to help them with money to get forged passports to help them escape. Prunella Gee as the Israeli colonel assigned to work with Templar to track Hakim. After losing track of Hakim the terrorists kidnap the colonel Leyla and propose an exchange, Hakim for Leyla or she dies. 5. THE VILLAGE THAT SOLD ITS SOUL Atmospheric episode with almost a feel of The Prisoner about it. Templar witnesses a woman being thrown into a quarry to her death and goes to nearby Santa Maria here in Borgia country in Italy. There he is confronted by police, the mayor, the villagers all involved in covering up the murder, but why ? The local priest is apparently on the list for the next one to die. Delores Strasser the victim was a whore and not popular but as Templar says it's hardly a reason for the whole village to engage in a cover up. The village patron Prince Lorenzo and his recently murdered son Enrique hold the key to why the priest and Delores are targets. 6. ASSAULT FORCE Templar rescues a lady in distress at Heathrow Airport, she was about to be attacked by an Oriental gentleman. It transpires she has come to England to campaign to free a group of nuns in her country who are to be executed by the despotic government in the Far East. Templar decides to help, but gets no joy from his government friends at the F.O. Surinet a top government official from the country in question is arriving in England for talks and Templar puts together a team of hand picked men to raid the airport where Surinet is arriving, kidnap him and exchange him for the nun's lives. But things go wrong after a couple of traitors in the assault force Templar has put together hand over Surinet to the embassy of the country to be smuggled back home to face trial. Templar has made a huge error, Surinet was in England to engage the British government to help overthrow the dictatorship run by Mattiah back home, and Simon has inadvertently handed Surinet to Mattiah's secret police. His rag tag assault team now have to rescue Surinet from the embassy or Templar is facing jail.

3. DUEL IN VENICE Beautifully shot in Venice, this episode sees Templar in a race against time to save a teenager kidnapped by a murderous lunatic with a grudge. Linda is the daughter of a friend of Simon and while Templar is distracted by a bogus message that he has a phone call, she is spirited away from a riverside cafe and onto a gondola by Jed Blackett. Blackett is a mercenary, and blames Templar for leaving him for dead in Angola, and has given Simon 6 hours to find them before he kills the girl. A speedboat taxi driver named Claudia helps Simon track down Linda by following various clues Blackett has left dotted around Venice. Ultimately Blackett wants Templar to reach them as he has prepared a horrible death for Templar and Linda, a funeral pyre which he intends placing Linda on ...while still alive. Maurice Colbourne excels as the deranged Blackett.

2. THE NIGHTMARE MAN Templar passes a hotel room in Paris while a lady screams after waking from a nightmare. She tells Simon her dream, her husband will be assassinated by a blonde haired hitman in London. This seems a harmless dream until it's revealed the lady is the wife of the new Italian ambassador. Templar tells Scotland Yard and Templar and the police become anxious when it's learnt that a blonde hitman has left Ecuador after killing police officers. Gunter is the man , a killer with a reputation for never missing, and the story has a twist when Templar sees the ambassador at the Italian embassy and discovers the wife is NOT the woman in the hotel. Who is she, why did she lie, why tell Templar, and Gunter is a reality so what's going on? Templar deduces that the woman could have been an actress, after checking through an actors directory the woman is located and she leads them to an ex Central American dictator in a wheelchair. Joss Ackland is great as Gunter.

RETURN OF THE SAINT This IMO is a very underrated show, made after the grittier The Sweeney and The Professionals , so perhaps seen as a throwback to more straightforward series. ITC's last show of this type, Ian Ogilvy excels in the role made famous by Roger Moore, this remake has plenty of gorgeous location work in Italy and France and I recommend it thoroughly. 1. THE JUDAS GAME A spectacular opening episode with great location shooting and a movie type plot. Templar is hired by MI6 to go into Albania to rescue Selma , an agent kidnapped by the Albanian state. Templar is hired because of his mountaineering skills as Selma is being held in a mountain fortress. Twists and turns abound as first we discover Selma played by Judy Geeson is actually a volunteer defector, who is training terrorists. Templar forcibly rescues and removes her from the Albanian soldiers and with the help of two local resistance fighters flees to the border to a waiting boat and MI6 friends. But a MI6 traitor has blown the location of the boat.

72. M Corp. The crew discovers that their computer system has been taken over by the rapacious M-Corp software group with the result that Lister cannot see anything not produced by them - including his crew-mates. Kryten must devise a way to reboot the system and Lister himself for a return to normality 73. Skipper. After a collision Red Dwarf is afflicted by a lesion in time and, as a result, every decision the crew makes is replaced by its alternative. Kryten realizes that to rectify things a quantum skipper must be activated . Rimmer uses this piece of tech to jump between parallel dimensions in the hope he can find one he can settle down in, one where he isn't such a loser. Will the infinite possible dimensions be a big enough number to find Rimmer a satisfactory existence or will he have to slink back to the Dwarfers and admit infinity wasn't big enough? I think we know the answer. Beyond Series 12 The future of Red Dwarf is likely to be one off specials. One has been made so far, with more promised. 74. 90 minute special- The Promised Land. A fleet of warships are helmed by the 'felis sapiens', under the tyrannical rule of Rodon, the ruthless feral cat leader who has vowed to wipe out all cats who worship anyone but him. Three cat clerics are to be executed for this crime, but manage to escape. They steal a shuttle and set course for their 'birthplace' to find their god. Meanwhile, Lister has spent weeks going through the areas of the ship that he has not investigated since he left stasis, including the cargo bays where amongst other things he finds the reboot-disc for Holly, the ship's computer who was lost years earlier. Booting it up, they discover that Holly has been restored from his original startup file, and fails to recognise the crew. After discovering that the ship is all but abandoned and serves no logistical purpose, Holly follows his pre-programmed instructions to dispose of the ship by destroying it. Unable to convince him otherwise, Lister, Kryten, Rimmer and Cat all flee in Starbug to find a new ship. The three cat clerics meet the Dwarfers, including their God, Lister and the battle against Rodon is fought. THE END.......FOR NOW?