Futtocks

Alda's version of Hawkeye has some fast-talking and sometimes barbed backchat, but there's also a fair amount of obvious and/or weak jokes per episode too. But then the series did run for slightly longer than ever, so there was always going to be a fair amount of filler.

Now that my dad's got to the point in his life where 99.99% of all TV presenters are unbearable for whatever irrational reason, M*A*S*H has become daily viewing for him recently. It is good fun, but I do prefer the big-screen version to the TV series.

Now we know why the BBC are running a series called 'Make me an Egghead'.

He is taking a risk, as I imagine that talented bakers with TV-friendly personalities can't be incredibly rare. And I'd suggest that he is the most replaceable of the four presenters. Masterchef: The Professionals have replaced their main chef/judge/presenter twice and the programme is still successful.

Fantasy Mission Force (1983) Officially an action comedy, but really, this Hong Kong movie makes no sense at all. Some American generals (in 19th century uniform) are captured in Canada by Japanese Nazis (in 20th century uniform). A 'Dirty Dozen' commando force is assembled, including two oriental soldiers in kilts, a woman who appear to be the only competent one, a bloke in a white dinner jacket, an escape artist and a drunk. I didn't mention that one of the generals is called Abraham Lincoln, did I? Jackie Chan is in this film, but his character is not part of the commando group, and only appears sporadically until... well, you'll see. Apparently, he owed one of the leading actors a favour. Which he now regrets. There are musical/dance sequences, hooded flying cannibal Amazons (keep up!), at least two cases of anal stabbing, hopping vampires, a torch-bearing Nazi horde and a stash of money, with all the scheming and double-crosses that that entails. Then, towards the end, all of the heroes are killed off really suddenly and Jackie Chan (who wasn't in the film all that much before but suddenly becomes a major character) kills the baddie as if he was the leading man all along. Some decent fight scenes, but also totally baffling and incoherent.

New owners often want to make changes. Look at Jura - it used to be a rare sight on a shop shelf, but now it is everywhere, and in various gimmicky versions. And not very special either. New Caol Ila is okay, but I've had it in the past when it was absolute nectar. It is possible that my taste has changed (but I still love Islay malts) or my memory was faulty, but it is just as likely that the recipe has been meddled with by some conglomerate.

I haven't tried it, but that price is attractive. If this is the Glen Marnoch Islay, there are several reviews online. The few I've read say it's a decent whisky, but not an outstanding one. Someone guessed at it being a young Caol Ila. At the price, definitely worth buying.

My sister's company's accountant (try to keep up!) has an old photo of him and a couple of similarly sharp-suited mates in their teenage years, posing with the Beatles by the entrance to the original Cavern Club.

Starcrash: all you need to know...

This song just popped into my head a few minutes ago, so I had to play it.

Just for that year alone, they had some stiff competition.

Ian Hunter & the Rant Band's tribute to David Bowie.

Okay, Mel and Sue have pulled out, and maybe Mary and Paul will too. But the dealbreaker is whether the Bake Off squirrel with the unfeasibly large conkers will go to C4 or not.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-37355065

None of the four were informed of the decision before the announcement was made, apparently. Mind you, Mel & Sue's first show was 'Light Lunch', on C4.

The boss of the company behind Bake Off (70% owned by Sky) said that it wasn't about who offered the biggest cheque. Then they accepted the biggest cheque the same day the BBC couldn't match C4's offer. So it would be quite funny if the show's popularity peaked with the current series and then went on the slide.

ABC have released a sequel to their 1982 debut album, The Lexicon of Love. The good news is that The Lexicon of Love II is pretty damn good!

I'm the man is also excellent, but you know what it's like when the right song/album hits you at exactly the right point in your life. I can play every single song from 'Look Sharp!' in my head. He also predicted Michael Bay's Hollywood career "In the cinema tonight/we sit and watch the robots fight/the human beings don't have much to say". (Instant Mash).

Joe Jackson - Look Sharp (2016 Reissue). No bonus tracks, but marginal sound quality improvements in what will never be a smooth-sounding recording. Great songs, though; I owned this album on cassette shortly after it was originally released and played it to death.

Anything by the Dutch band zZz?

What is this, your first and last albums when sorted alphabetically? Let's take a look at my collection... #1 Record (Big Star) Zoot Allures (Frank Zappa)

I had steak the other night, accompanied by Sainsbury's 'Taste the Difference' triple-cooked chips in beef dripping. But the latter seem to have completely vanished from the shelves since, or I'd have bought another lot the next day. And the day after. And the day after that. Is Heston Blumenthal still advocating that method of flipping them every 20 seconds or so? It does work, but it is also a bit of a faff. It does keep you occupied, though.

Too late, I scoffed the lot.

In the slow cooker for tonight, a couple of lamb neck fillets with shallots, chervil, English mustard and garlic. All inside a roasting bag, to keep in all the flavours.