They Don't Make TV Series For Kids Nowadays Like This/ 1.The Feathered Serpent/2. Catweazle/3.Ace Of Wands/4.THE GHOSTS OF MOTLEY HALL/ 5. TIMESLIP

[HawkMan]

Back at Duck Halt,
CW " he shall not hoodwink me again, I know him now"
Cd " listen I can't take the stuff back now, they'll ask too many questions. You'll have to bring it back tonight."
CW " huh?"
Cd " it's the only way, come about midnight, I'll leave a window open"

It's nearly midnight and Cedric in his pyjamas runs quietly down stairs to open a window for Catweazle. He is the hallway when a torch light shines in his face.
Lord Collingford, Charles, is there,
LC " Cedric?!"
Cd " Dad?"
LC " what an earth are you doing here?"
Cd " erm..I was hungry."
LC ' you're always hungry "
Cedric notices Charles holding a wooden club like stick with a rounded top.

 

 

Cd " what's that?"
LC " a knobkerrie, look get yourself some cake or whatever then back to bed."
Cd " what's it for?"
LC " Tearful Ted "
Cd " who?"
LC " the burglar, Inspector Pugh thinks he may try again tonight."
Cd " WHAT!! You didn't tell me"
LC " sssshhhh, don't wake your Mother, I haven't told her yet either."
Cd " why?, what's going on?"
LC " well we've set a trap, left one of the sitting room windows open, Pugh's outside somewhere "
Cd " where?"
LC " I don't know, just lurking somewhere. He's got one of his chaps with him."
Cd " why didn't you tell me?"
LC " we thought it better not to. Go and get your cake, and don't turn the lights on."
LC " where are you going now?"
LC " on patrol, you, cake and bed"
Cd " can I come?"
LC " absolutely not, goodnight."
Charles runs off, Cedric concerned, Catweazle is due soon, and the police are around.
Cedric runs into sitting room, sees open window and closes it, he doesn't want Catweazle getting in now with the stolen stuff. In the grounds Inspector Pugh is on patrol. He whispers forcibly, in the middle of the beautiful garden surrounding the house.
P " Williams?"
A uniformed officer pokes his head up from behind a bush.

P " oh good, you remember don't you?, one blast on the whistle, he's inside, two, outside, three front, four back. Have you got that?"
Williams nods,
P " good, now off you go"
Pugh walks off, unseen nearby is Tearful Ted in his tramps disguise.

Meanwhile Catweazle on his tricycle arrives in the nearby edge of the woods, close to King's Farthing, he dismounts carrying the sack of stolen property.
Tearful Ted has removed his wig, to reveal a short classic haircut, and he is now in police uniform. At his feet is Williams, bound and gagged. Ted moves off to towards the house.

Cedric has crept outside looking desperately for Catweazle to stop him coming. Inspector Pugh turns the corner and sees Cedric, who quick wittedly pretends he is sleepwalking. Arms outstretched in front of him, Cedric does an about turn and walks off fake sleepwalking, Pugh follows.
Around another corner of the mansion, Cedric quickly runs for cover behind garden furniture. Pugh turns corner, and walks straight passed the hiding Cedric.
A police car is parked on the driveway, another uniformed officer awaits.
P." Davidson did you see the boy go by?"
Davidson shakes head,
P " he's walking in his sleep, if you see him, don't wake him, bad for him you know."

Edited March 14 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

Cedric turns corner and collides with Catweazle who lets out a shriek of alarm.
Cd " be quiet, quiet, come on"
There are hiding in a little yard outside the kitchen entrance.
Cd " the place is crawling with police, Dad's on the warpath."
CW ( anguished) " let me go"
Cd " quiet"
Pugh walks by , not seeing them, and walks off round the property.
Cd " you got to help me put the stuff back, come on"
Tearful Ted is very close by, in uniform looking to break cover of the bushes and enter house.
Cedric and Catweazle enter sitting room.
Cd " put everything up there ( mantelpiece), I'll keep watch"
Ted is standing by window about to climb in, but before going any further gets the whistle and puts it up to his lips. He overheard the code, he blows, two whistles, a gap, then three whistles, sending the police off in wrong direction.
Pugh nearby,
P " outside...front"
He runs off as Ted enters property.
Cedric hearing whistles pokes head out of sitting room, only to see Charles.
LC " I told you to go to bed....(hears whistles)..outside front"

Charles runs off, Cedric goes back to Catweazle,
Cd " get out through the window."
Cedric leaves Catweazle confused as hell goes over to window.
Outside Pugh ,Charles and Davidson meet up, they run off to where they think Ted is.
But Ted actually is sneaking into sitting room, holding torch. Catweazle hears him enter, moves over from window, and is framed in torchlight.
TT " stone the crows...what are you doing here?"
Catweazle pulls out Adamcos his knife,
CW " who art thou?"
Ted smiles realising Catweazle doesn't recognise him.

TT " oh , erm PC Williams Elderford police, you can put that knife away lad."
Ted spies the sack of treasure he stole.
TT " what's this?"
CW " it was filched from this place by a ragged varmint."
TT " oh is that so?"
CW " if he shows himself just once more he'll be blasted"
TT ( smiling)" will he?!"
CW " he tried to trick me, but I was too clever for him"
TT ( humouring) " were you indeed?"
CW " silver tongued snake!"
TT " what about these valuables?"
CW " I have come hither to return them."
TT " I'll give you a hand"
CW " nay, not for ten hands shall ye have them"
TT " no I meant I'll help you put them back, then you can go home."
They start putting silver cups and goblets back on mantelpiece.

Lady Collingford, Dotty, is awake and on the landing sees Cedric down in the hall.
LyC " Cedric what an earth is going on, where's your father?"
Cd " it's the burglar "
LyC " don't be silly Cedric that was last night."
Cd " he came back, Dad's gone to catch him"
LyC " catch him, where?"
Cd " in the front apparently, Inspector Pugh is with him"
LyC " with the burglar?"
Cd " no, Dad"
LyC " I think it's all very childish, all this running about blowing whistles. The only thing your father will catch is a cold. Now Cedric, bed."
Ted and Catweazle finish putting stolen stuff back, Ted wants Catweazle gone so he can steal them again.
TT " okay lad run along, I'll carry on from here, let me show you out."

Ted leads Catweazle to window, as a disappointed trio of Pugh, Charles and Davidson meet at front door.
P " I'm sure we'll get him one day sir."
LC " well I hope I'm on the magistrates bench when you do."
P" Davidson, you better get Williams. You never know sir those cups may turn up eventually. Anyhow we've probably stopped him taking other stuff."
LC " I hope so, goodnight "
P " goodnight sir, I should lock up if I were you sir."
Ted is pushing Catweazle out of the sitting room window.
CW " I have the bone ache"
TT " come on out you old idiot."
As Catweazle climbs out, Davidson turns to see, he blows on his whistle. Tearful Ted realises he needs to scarper leaving his haul.
Pugh had reached his car when he hears more whistles,
P " outside..back"

Catweazle runs back into house looking for another way out.
Tearful Ted has reached front door but it's locked. Charles runs up thinking he's one of Pugh's men.
LC " sorry, just locked it"
He opens door for a smiling Ted and starts following Ted out, until a restraining hand stops him.
TT " no its okay sir, I'll go."
LC " hope you catch him"
 

Pugh is outside,
" Williams? Williams where are you?"
Suddenly Pugh trips up, over the bound and gagged Williams, and ends up on the ground.
P" Williams?!!"

 

 

Housekeeper Mrs Gowdy is on landing with Dotty.
MG " are you alright my lady?"
LyC " I think so Mrs Gowdy"
Meantime Catweazle desperately trying to get out creeps onto the landing, sees Dotty and Mrs Gowdy and backs away and accidentally knocks over a bronze freestanding but empty plant pot.
Charles hearing this runs to investigate thinking the noise came from downstairs, passing Dotty looking down from landing.
LyC " Charles?"
LC " in a minute Dotty darling "
MG " what is going on?"
LyC " I really don't know, I'm hoping to be told eventually "
Charles creeps gingerly into sitting room ,Pugh is there with torch, the torchlight sweeps over the mantelpiece.
P " Crickey"
LC " no, croquet Inspector, it's magic but how?"
All the silver is back on display.

P " Tearful Ted, it must have been him, he's repented at last "
LC " amazing "
On the landing,
Mrs Gowdy, " shall I see what's going on my Lady"
LyC " no thank you, all that whistling, it might start up again. I wonder if other people have such noisy burglars."
MG " shall I make a pot of tea?"
LyC " no thank you Mavis, you go off to bed, all I want is for the Elderford police to go home."
Catweazle still here on the landing hiding behind a pillar, trapped hoping to get down the stairs and out.

 

Edited March 14 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

Charles runs into hall, calling up,
LC " Dotty darling the cups are back"
LyC " I know I may be in need of sleep but I thought you said the cups were back."
LC " I did, the croquet cups isn't that fantastic. Tearful Ted must have brought them back"
LyC " how kind of him, that's marvellous."
LC " the only thing missing is that creepy looking inkwell."
LyC " well I never liked that anyway. I do wish you'd come to bed Charles "
LC " just going to lock up Dotty darling."
Dotty turns and SCREAMS.

Catweazle is standing before her , she faints, he runs down the stairs. Charles is running up , Catweazle quickly hides behinds the curtains covering the stairs window.
Charles runs passed, Cedric runs out of his bedroom. Charles and Cedric pick Dotty up.
LyC " the burglar...."
Cd " what's happened"
LC " it's all been too much for her, she thought she saw the burglar."
LyC " I did see him Charles "
Cedric looks down into hallway, he sees Catweazle creeping out of front door.

At Duck Halt the next day.
Cd " thank you for bringing everything back, well nearly everything."
CW " what does thou mean?"
Cd " what about the inkwell?"
CW " inkwell?"
Cd " hmm, the creepy looking inkwell."
CW " this?"

Catweazle laughs as he shows Cedric the one piece he has kept, a silver inkwell in the shape of a crab!
Cd " sign of the crab?"
CW " aye, sign of the crab."
Cd " and I said no more stealing."
CW " is but borrowed my brother.....until I can fly."

Cast;
Cedric....Gary Warren
Charles.....Moray Watson
Dotty....Elspet Gray
Catweazle......Geoffrey Bayldon
Mrs Gowdy....Gwen Nelson
Pugh......Derek Francis
Ted.......Ronald Lacey

Edited March 14 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

 

AFTER POSTING THIS EPISODE,  JUST REALISED EPISODE 5 WAS LOST WHEN THE SITE WENT DOWN. I'LL REPOST IT BELOW.

 

S2 E6- THE WOGLE STONE

At the disused railway station Duck Halt Catweazle continues to look for the 12 signs of the zodiac in his quest to fly. He gazes into a crystal ball that he has found and looks into it deeply.
C " oh please spirits of earth air fire and water and the wondrous spirit of electrickery, where shall I find the sign of the maiden"
Further looking into the ball;
C " water.....hidden water"
Catweazle turns to his pet toad Touchwood that lives in an old Wellington boot.
C " the ways of magic are like a twisted path Touchwood. If the hidden water will lead me to the sign of the maiden, first I must find the water "
Catweazle picks up his water divining stick, a Y shaped stick, and determinedly leaves Duck Halt.

Outside King's Farthing, the name of the stately home of the Collingfords , there is a Rolls Royce parked, just outside the entrance gates of the estate. A man sits nervously at the wheel, a black cat sits in front of the car stubbornly refusing to move. The man is Jack Victor.
JV ( at cat) " move it , go away, go on go away , damn it "

Close by in the woods Catweazle hears as Jack Victor uses the car horn to try and get the cat moving.
C " Hunters!!.mayhaps it is me they hunt"

Jack Victor picks up the car telephone
JV " this is 286246, get me 014938188.......
Jack Victor here, I'm 200 yards....er....some distance from Kings Thingamy , will you tell Lord whatisname I'll be late...thank you"
Victor suddenly sees Catweazle, who is hiding behind a tree.
JV " hey you come here...listen...I just want a word with you "
Cautiously Catweazle walks to the car.

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

In the dining room at King's Farthing Lord Collingford is on the phone.
LC " oh I see, can't be helped"
He turns to Lady Collingford at the breakfast table.
LC " that wretched man's office again, he's going to be late "
LyC " don't get nervous Charles "
LC " it's these business tycoons, I never know how to talk to them "
LyC " I expect he'll do all the talking"
LC " I didn't understand a word of his letter. I don't like it Dotty darling, and I won't be talked into it, whatever it is"
Catweazle is at the window of the Rolls Royce.
JV " can you move that cat"
C " mayhap it is a fetch"
JV ( worried) " a fetch...that's a witch in the shape of a cat isn't it?"

C " aye, but fear not , behold...( pointing at cat)...oh witch depart if fetch thou art, for too long has sat if thou are cat"
Catweazle strokes cat
C " yan...tan..tethera..( picks up cat)...nay is but a blackberry cat"
JV " that's alright then,...who are you?"
C " I am Catweazle master magician "
Victor drives off into the grounds of King's Farthing.

At the front of the mansion Groome the handyman is up a ladder cleaning the glass panes of the main door, Cedric is watching him.
G " haven't you got anything better to do than watch me?"
Jack Victor's car pulls up, and the cigar smoking very superstitious tycoon gets out.
JV " hello I'm Jack Victor I've come to see Lord Collingford "
Cd " yes my father said you'd be coming. I'm Cedric. Do come in, they're in the dining room "
JV " the ladder..er.."
Cd " it's quite safe"
JV " yeah, but I'll have to go under it to get in, know what I mean "
G " I suppose you want me to move it?"
JV " if you wouldn't mind"
Groom grimaces and descends the ladder.

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

Catweazle in the woods with his divining stick , and suddenly the stick shakes, as if water is detected. Catweazle excitedly bends down in grass, but he has only found a discarded milk bottle with dirty rainwater in it.
C " if I find not water, I will never find the sign of the maiden "

In the dining room at the manor, Victor has laid out a map across the dining table, a bemused Lord and Lady Collingford and Cedric look on.
JV " now then, Victor Investments Re housing Group Organisation has decided this whole area is ripe for development. We've already started building in Elderford"
LyC " what those bungalows...oh dear"
JV " they're very nice, they all have their own baths, central heating and double glazing. You won't recognise this place in five years, they'll be 200,000 people living here"
LC " ( alarmed) " how many?!"
JV " 200,000....depending on where we put the factory...( leans over map)...look here's Elderford and here's King's thingamy"
LC " King's Farthing...what's all this here"

 

JV " houses shops offices "
LC " but they're on my land"
JV " they are now yes"
LC " but these houses come right up to my moat"
JV " alright we'll plant a row of trees, coniferous , they'll hide everything those will. I'll come straight to the point, we want to buy 253 acres of your land "
LC " it's not for sale"
JV " do you know how much it's worth "
LC " not exactly "
JV " I do, 80,000 pounds"
LC " 80,000!" ( approx 1.2m in 2020)
JV " and the stars all point to this very area, the vibrations and the omens are very good"
LyC " omens?"
JV " oh yes, for instance Elderford has nine letters, that's very lucky"
LyC " I didn't know that"
JV " look I don't expect you to rush into this without knowing the facts, what I really came to ask you is, is it alright for my surveyor to look over the land, dig a few trial holes, check the ground over"

 

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

Catweazle has come to a building site , or the beginning of one anyway. A large hole dug in the earth by a mechanical digger, one man operating it, another watches, then a car pulls up, the site surveyor gets out and calls to men.
Surveyor " tea up lads "
Catweazle ( hiding behind tree) " tea up? The call of the hunters "
The men go into a hut for tea. Catweazle creeps up to digger and looks up in awe at the machine, not having a clue as to what it is. Suddenly a bit of ground under the digger gives way, the 'claw' of the machine creaks loudly and then falls from its horizontal position to a vertical one, Catweazle alarmed steps backwards and falls into hole, the men come out of the hut and run over to see Catweazle in the hole.
Surveyor " what are you doing down there, come out NOW"

Catweazle climbs out and runs away screaming on fear.
C " spirits of the brazen vessel help me"
Back at King's Farthing;
JV " how do I get to this little railway station here. We'll have to buy that too"
Cd "you don't mean Duck Halt?"
JV " that's right Duck Halt"
Cd " why d'you want to buy that "
JV " we'll have to buy it so we can pull it down, there's a service road going through there"
Cedric has heard enough he must warn Catweazle.
Catweazle has run full pace back to Duck Halt, and enters waiting room that is his home.
C " Touchwood, they hunt for me with monsters. They have pits to trap me, we must make magic."

Jack Victor is on phone;
JV " oh well done lad, draw up a contract, pin them down "
Lady Collingford whispers to Lord Collingford.
LyC " I suppose we'll have to ask him to stay for lunch "
LC " but I can't stand the fellow "
LyC " me neither, but we'll have to ask "
JV (putting phone down) " another feather in our cap, big development in Wales"
LyC " I don't suppose you could stay for lunch?"
JV " that'll be nice, thank you "
LyC ( sighs) " oh...good"

Cedric arrives at Duck Halt and opens waiting room door, and is almost knocked over by a pram, sent flying across room by Catweazle .
Cd " hey..."
C " pardon, pardon Owlface, it was not meant for thee"
Cedric wears glasses, hence Catweazle calling him Owlface.
Cd " you jolly nearly got me. And listen Catweazle they're going to pull this place down "
C " the hunters?"
Cd " hunters?...no they're builders "
C " builders, but they hunt me with a toothy monster "
Cd " that's just a machine to help them build"
C " I will not go from here"
Cd " don't you see if they buy it they'll make you go"
C " make ME! HA! I who have escaped from the Normans "
Cedric only half believes Catweazle has come from the past.
Cd " erm...I wouldn't brag about that if I were you. You see it's not your place really, and if they catch you , well they might make you live somewhere not nice "
C " not nice?"
Cd " so we have to stop them"
C " we will by magic "
Cd " what magic"
C " the power of the wogle stone"
Cd "the what stone?"
C " has thou never heard of the wogle!!?"
Cd " no"
C " place it where they will build, call on Hecate, and no man will come near "
Cd " what does it look like?"
C " well like .er.....like....like a wogle thou gowk" ( foolish person- Old English)
Cd " so you just plonk a stone down and all the builders and bricklayers pack up and go home "
Cd " no one shall build where stands the wogle stone. Come Owlface "

 

Catweazle picks up divining stick.
C " this will lead us to the wogle stone "
Cd " I thought that was for water "
C " aye....water and wogle stones"

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

In the grounds of King's Farthing Cedric and Catweazle approach the moat. These days unlike in 1066 when Catweazle jumped in, the moat is virtually dry, just a trickle of water. It is basically a deep ditch about 100 yards from the manor house.
Catweazle holds his wooden divining stick. This time he holds the other end of the stick to when he was looking for water. The stick vibrates.
C " ah...it is near"
Cd " you're picking up water from the moat"
C " nay, this end for wogle stones, other end for water "
Cd " those stones are wogle stones?"
C " one of them is"
Cd " which one?"
C " I know not"
Cd " keep down, you can be seen from the house "
C" bah!"
Cd " the whole idea is crazy, how can a stone stop anything "
Catweazle takes Touchwood out of the pocket of his brown robe and holds the toad on his palm.
C " come Touchwood "
Touchwood starts croaking ,
C " see , he feels its power"
The croaking gets louder as Catweazle nears a stone.
C " here it is"
The stone is a spherical grey stone, about two foot in diameter.
Cd " looks like any normal stone to me"
C (angry) " thou glass eyed Gaul fly can you not feel its power"
Cedric and Catweazle together lift up stone from moat bed, and then it drops, Catweazle jumps out the way as it thuds down on the earth.
Cd (smiles) "almost felt its power then didn't you"

 

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

At lunch at King's Farthing Charles and Dotty Collingford, Lord and Lady, are listening to Jack Victor, wearily.
JV " then I took over Amalgamated Construction "
LyC " was that predicted in the stars too"
JV " oh yes, and the cards too"
LyC " cards?"
Victor learns forward and accidentally knocks over a salt cellar.
JV " oh sorry "
LC " never mind, leave it"
JV " I'm sorry I have to do this"
Victor picks up a pinch of salt and flings it over his shoulder saying,
JV " one for silver, one for gold, and one for luck that's never told"

Back in the moat Cedric has got a wooden wheelbarrow.
Cd " it must weigh a ton, we'll never lift it"
C " believe in my powers Owlface"
The two stand either side of stone ready to lift it into wheelbarrow.
C " yan, tan, tethera"
They lift it and put it in barrow, and the bottom of the barrow falls out, crushed. But it's okay, the stone is wedged in the barrow, it can be moved. They set off to the building site.
Back at lunch Jack Victor is still droning on.
JV " at this moment Virgo is building 600 homes"
LyC " virgo?"
JV " Victor investment rehousing group organisation....v, i, r, g, o, ...Virgo for short "
LyC " but must you build here Mr Victor, surely there's other places"
JV " I can't ignore the omens. I don't understand you Lady Collingford, anyone would think you don't want to sell"
Charles and Dotty stare at each other, there's no getting through to this guy.

Cedric and Catweazle are heading towards the site, wheeling the huge stone , Touchwood riding on top of it .
Cd " I honestly don't know why we're doing this, what if the builders don't know about the wogle stone?"
C " then they will learn. No man may build......"
Cd " .....where stands the wogle, come on then "
Suddenly after hitting an uneven patch of ground the wheelbarrow topples over, the stone thuds into the ground.
C (alarmingly) " Touchwood where are thou?"
But the toad is okay, Catweazle scoops him up and strokes him.
C " my wondrous beast I thought I'd lost you"
Cd " I should never have listened to you in the first place. Let's forget the whole idea"
C " nay , thy faint hearted brisket."

 

 

Jack Victor gets in his car Charles and Dotty see him off.
JV " think it over, 80,000 pounds is a lot of money and I've noticed your guttering, very dodgy, money'll be useful ,...I'll be back at 6"
The Rolls Royce leaves.
LyC " do you think he intends staying for dinner"
LC " I don't think I could stand it"
LyC " we better expect it, and if he doesn't it'll be such a lovely surprise "

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

Arriving at the building site, Cedric and Catweazle place the stone at the edge of the hole dug by the builders.
Cd " are you sure this is the right place?"
C " aye, it is where I fell, and see the monster,.....er..machine "
Cd " cheek , they must have been digging on our land for hours. What do we do now?"
Catweazle takes a piece of chalk from his robe and draws something on the stone.
C " now we wait"
Cd " what for, Mr Victor might not be back for hours "
C " someone comes I see them"
Cd (puzzled) " where I don't see anyone "
C ( points to own forehead ) " I see them here"
Victor turns up in his Rolls Royce.
Cd " you're right.....for once"
The two of them hide behind digger as Jack Victor beeps horn and his men come out of hut. Walter Richardson is the surveyor. Their attention is drawn to the huge stone perched on the edge of the pit. A spherical stone with two eyes drawn on it in chalk.

 

R " what the hell is it?"
Catweazle emerges from hiding place.
C " touch not the wogle stone "
R " the what!!?"
JV " the wogle stone, didn't you hear him"
R " I heard him alright, he's given us trouble before "
C " touch not the wogle stone "
R " what this thing?"
C " he that does touch the wogle stone shall all alone moan and groan"
JV " I don't like the sound of that"
C " thou must not move it"
Cedric behind the digger is trying not to laugh.
JV " it'll have to be moved sometime, there's going to be a supermarket built here"
C " no man can build where stands the wogle stone "

R ( shouts)" he's round the bend!!"
JV " I've never heard of a wogle stone have you?"
R ( shouts)" NO I BLOODY HAVEN'T and nor has anyone else, he's potty...now listen you old fool...."
JV " steady on Walter"
R ( shouts) "there's going to be a big estate here, and it will take more than that overgrown pebble to stop that "
JV " don't antagonize him, he might have the evil eye"
R " I'm worried about you Jack, why do you believe in all this nonsense"
JV " it's best to be on the safe side and it could be an omen "
R " omens, signs , this is supposed to be a building site NOT A BLOODY FAIRY RING"
JV " couldn't we just leave it for now?"
R " no we couldn't "
JV " I hope you're right"
Victor goes back to his car for sanctuary. Richardson calls over to the other men.
R " Dave, Billy , over here , lets move this "
Catweazle kneels in front of stone and closes his eyes.
Jack in his car gets a phone call.

 

JV ( phone) " hello...WHAT!.......WHAT!!..( getting out of car).....don't touch that stone."
R " now what..?"
JV " we've just lost the Welsh contract because of that thing"
Catweazle stands and smiles,
C " ah...now you have seen the light"
R ( shouts) " GET LOST YOU"
JV " Walter I don't know what to do, I think I'm going to have a nervous breakdown "
R ( to men) " get rid of that thing "
JV " touch that stone and you're fired"
Catweazle's divining stick suddenly vibrates,
C " ah...water....I have found hidden water..."
JV " he has too, he must be a water diviner, there must be an underground river "
R " don't be ridiculous "
JV " we can't build here, not over an underground river "
R " you're not taking that idiot's word for it?"
JV " I've worked with water diviners before, it's uncanny, they're never wrong"
R " look Jack who's the surveyor "
JV " you are , but he's a water diviner, he's found water, that's good enough for me. We are not building here"
Victor marches off, Catweazle triumphantly looks on, Cedric comes out of hiding grinning.

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

Outside King's Farthing Jack Victor is saying goodbye to the Collingfords.
LC " an underground river?"
JV " no doubt about it, according to my surveyor these water diviners really know their stuff"
LyC " water diviner , what did he look like?"
JV " funny old fella ,bit of a hermit if you ask me. But he was right, you can't build where there's a wogle stone, didn't know that did you "
LC " ..er.....no"
JV " take care of it.....the wogle stone "
The car drives off, Lord and Lady Collingford stand bemused.

Back at the site, the men are in their hut, Catweazle is using a pick axe digging deeper into the pit.
C " hidden water, I know it is here "
Suddenly a torrent of water spurts upwards, drenching Catweazle.
C ( gleefully) " I have found it, the hidden water...."
Cd" Catweazle you great idiot , you've burst a water main "
But Catweazle isn't listening, but running away joyfully.

Jack Victor is again having trouble with a black cat, this time on his way out of King's Farthing. His car motionless as he stares at cat.
JV " oh not again, go away....."
Catweazle turns up and picks up cat, and walks holding it up to Victor.
C " it will bring thee luck"
JV " just a blackberry cat eh.....listen I can't thank you enough for finding the river"
C " oh it was nothing "
Jack hands him his business card,
JV " next time you're in town, look me up"
Catweazle looks in wonderment at the card.

Back at Duck Halt, Cedric and Catweazle, and of course Touchwood the toad, are together.
C " I don't understand, why did he give you his card?"
C ( sighs) " thou art ox witted Owlface. See.."

 

 

The card has VIRGO printed on it, which Catweazle can't read ,but also a logo next to the letters, an artist's depiction of a young woman in a robe.
C " the sign of the maiden. Another sign, soon I will have them all......then I shall fly"
The End

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

 

Re -Posted version after original got wiped. Episode 6 posted above.

S2 E5 THE BLACK WHEELS

Catweazle is down at the Elderford rubbish tip, collecting junk, that to him is wondrous.
He gets on his tricycle, has a rope hooked up to a pram which is full of this junk, and pedals back to Duck Halt, the disused railway station he calls home.
He enters the waiting room with his "booty".
CW " Touchwood see, the marvels these foolish sorcerers leave behind, wondrous, miracles."
He picks up a wall clock from the pram, and places it among other wall clocks he has gathered.
CW " aha...tyrant thou has lost thy power, join thy brothers."
Next a colander, he looks at it puzzled,
CW "this bowl will hold no water, some looneth has made holes in it. ( sighs) Your right Touchwood I found not what I sought, the sign of the lion is hidden from me"
Catweazle is engaged in collecting examples of all 12 signs of the zodiac in order to fly, or so he thinks.
Catweazle then sees in his newly acquired rubbish, a book.
CW " mayhap a book."

He opens it , the " pages" are record sleeves, each with a vinyl disc inside them, Catweazle picks one out of a sleeve, this one is in two pieces, he realises the pieces fit to make one black disc.
CW " it's a mystery....magic."

At King's Farthing, handyman Groome is sitting in the kitchen, towel over his head, breathing in steam from a bowl of hot water, trying to rid himself of a rotten cold.
Mrs Gowdy the housekeeper looks on,
MG " you ought to see a doctor Henry, you're behaving like a child, he won't hurt you"
Gr ( whispered croaky vioce) " I don't need a doctor."

MG " what nonsense, what about tomorrow."
Gr " I wish you'd mind your own business Mrs Gowdy "
MG " anything to do with King's Farthing is my business, and it's no use hiding under that towel, I'll see what his Lordship says."

Catweazle has taken two more records out of their sleeves, and placed them on the floor, he studies them puzzled.
CW " what is the power of these black wheels Touchwood? Oh Adramalic, Nurgarl, wise demons I call on thee tell me the power of these black wheels...( pulls a face) .nothing works! Owlface, he will tell me."


Mrs Gowdy approaches Lord and Lady Collingford sitting outside at a garden table having tea.
MG " it's bad news I'm afraid."

Cedric meanwhile is at the vintage car the Collingfords use, washing it, with a bucket of water, a cloth, and musical accompaniment, he has a turntable near playing classical music.

Charles and Dotty on hearing the news,
LC " suppose the doctor can't do anything?"
LyC " then you'll have to put the whole thing off."
LC " Buckhunter, I can't do that, he's president of the historic weapons society, he's bringing them all tomorrow."
LyC " the weapons?
LC " no no , the society"
LyC " then there's only one thing to do, find another guide."
LC " another guide? Who on earth are we going to find to do that?
LyC ( smiles) " you Charles."

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

Cedric still at the car, he walks over to a tap to fill bucket again. Catweazle turns up , parks his tricycle at the edge of the woods, and through the gates of King's Farthing and sees the car and hears the music.
Puzzled he approaches turntable, the lid is on it, so he cannot see the record playing, but listens to the pleasing sound.
Cedric at tap suddenly sees him, and sees Mrs Gowdy heading in their direction. He runs up to Catweazle,
Cd " quick hide"

 

Catweazle is pushed into back of car, Cedric closes door ,just in time to see Mrs Gowdy turn corner,
MG " my word, you're quick"
Cd " you have to be"
MG "Groome takes all day. I like your music, does it help?"
Cd " yes"
MG " there's some polish in the car."
Cd ( alarmed) " no there isn't."
Mrs Gowdy opens door, takes out polish tin,
MG " here we are, well I won't interrupt you."
She leaves, a relieved Cedric opens door, no sign of Catweazle.
Cedric sees him crouching at front of car,
Cd " I've told you a hundred times, stay at Duck Halt...erm, let's go over there."
Cedric leads Catweazle to greenhouse, inside,
Cd " pooeey, you've been to the old rubbish tip haven't you?"
CW " wondrous I can keep nothing from you."
Cd " or anyone else"
Catweazle points to turntable,
CW " tis thine?"
Cd " the car?"
CW " nay the noise box"
Cd " oh the record player, yes that's mine"
CW " tis great magic, electrickery?"
Cd " batteries, one watt output"
CW " put out one what?"
Cd " one watt output, oh skip it"
CW " skip it?! Thou art a riddler my brother"
Cd " (laughs) " you are an idiot Catweazle, you better go.".
CW " I have a marvel to show thee, strange black wheels."
Cd " well I can't come now, everything's chaos, Groome's lost his voice"
CW " his voice, where?"
Cd " here of course."
CW " has thou searched for it?"
Cd " searched for it!?"
CW " the lost voice of thy Groome. If I find it for thee will thou tell me the secret of the black wheels?"
Cd " you're potty"
CW " I need your bucket"
Cd " why?"
CW " to put the voice in......come"
Catweazle runs off with the bucket, Cedric reluctantly follows.

Charles and Dotty are in the drawing room,
LC " I wouldn't know where to begin."
LyC " Groome usually begins in the hall. You know, Ladies and Gentlemen welcome to King's Farthing home of Lord Collingford and famous for its collection of..."
LC " military equipment dating from the Conquest "
LyC " you see"
LC " yes I know the opening of course but what happens after that, no Dotty it's not on."
LyC " you can learn it, it's all in our guidebook , you might even get a tip."
LC " might I?"
LyC " and what you can't remember you can make up."
LC " what with General Buckhunter and the weapons society breathing down my neck?"
LyC " well I don't think we should rely on Groome."
LC " no I suppose not, alright I'll try."
LyC (warmly)" oh Charles how brave"
LC " I don't have to wear that awful cap do I?"

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

Groome is in bed in the servants lodge, Mrs Gowdy knocks on the door and comes in with a tray of food.
MG " ah that's better, don't talk just rest."
She puts the tray down across the bed, Groome clutching his throat trying and failing to speak at all now.
MG ( shouts) " THE DOCTOR'S COMING LATER"
She leaves, Groome grimaces, he ain't deaf!

Catweazle and Cedric are in the woods,
Cd " Catweazle?"
CW " there my brother."
Cd " what?"
CW " in the well"
Cd " what is?"
CW " the lost voice, harken"
Catweazle leans into the well,
CW " good morrow."

The echo comes back, Catweazle manoeuvres the bucket over the well, Cedric can't help but laugh.
CW " ( angry) " stop cackling, why does thou titter?"
Cd " I can't help it, it's an echo you fool, you can't put an echo in a bucket!".
CW " but it is the voice."
Cd " no it's not, Groome lost his voice because of laryngitis."
CW " laryngitis, tis a demon I know not"
Cd " listen Catweazle when someone loses their voice, it doesn't mean they've lost their voice, it means, ( whispers) they've lost their voice."
CW " now thine has gone"
Cd " no it hasn't, you better go home Catweazle."
Cedric goes back to cleaning the car, Catweazle appears again,
Cd " will you go away"
CW " mayhap it's in the house"
Cd " you'll drive me potty in a minute, now once and for all, you can't have a voice without a body."
Suddenly the music on the record player has vocals, a singer.
CW " thou liest"

Cd " yes you can on a record."
CW " record?"
Cd " here, have a look."
Cedric opens lid of player , Catweazle sees record spinning round.
CW ( excitedly) " THE BLACK WHEELS THE BLACK WHEELS "
Cd " the voice is on the record."
CW " THE BLACK WHEELS, THE LOST VOICE, THE BLACK WHEELS "
Catweazle runs off joyfully,
Cd " what's got into him now?"
Catweazle runs excitedly into Duck Halt, and picks up his record collection.
CW " Touchwood the mystery is solved, trapped inside these wheels are lost voices. The Groome has lost his voice, but he shall have another, I will show Owlface my magic."

Catweazle has a pottery bowl , in it he is smashing up records with a stick, while saying,
CW " tan tethera, pethera.."
The bowl is full of vinyl record chips, he pours them into a mug.


Meanwhile Lord Collingford, Charles, is halfway up the stairs leading from the hallway, talking to no one , practicing being a guide.
LC " ladies and gentlemen welcome to King's Farthing home of...no..famous for its military weapons dating from the Conquest. If you'll all follow me, ( walking upstairs), on your left is a portrait of...oh...me"

It is indeed a portrait of Charles in Lord's regalia.
Catweazle sets off from Duck Halt on his tricycle.
Cedric arrives at the lodge located at the end of the main driveway , Mrs Gowdy waits outside,
Cd " doctor's on his way"
MG " oh good, you want me to stay?"
Cd " it's okay I'll show him"
MG " thank you Cedric"
Mrs Gowdy leaves, and seconds later Cedric looks in fear as Catweazle on his tricycle pedals into the drive, and gets off his bike.
Cd " what are you doing here?"
CW " where is thy Groome?"
Cd " go away! He's in there if you must know."
Catweazle holding his mug of " medicine " runs into lodge,
Cd " come back.....Catweazle."

[HawkMan]

Cedric follows Catweazle in,
Cd " the doctor's arriving at any minute, you'll get caught."
Catweazle pushes away Cedric's hand,
CW " unhand me Owlface"
Cd " what are you doing here?"
CW " I have a new voice for thy Groome."
Cd " what !?"
A car hooter is heard,
Cd " the doctor...wait here"
Cedric runs out as the car passes lodge,
Cd" ( calling) " doctor."
Catweazle enters the bedroom, Groome is asleep, Catweazle uses his wooden stirrer to mix vinyl chips in mug , then leans over bed.
CW " waken O Groome"
Groome wakes, and gets a shock as Catweazle, half on bed, holds out spoonful of vinyl.
CW " thy voice cannot be found , but I have brought thee another."
Gr ( mouthing) " HELP!"

Catweazle slips a spoonful in Groome's mouth, that is immediately spat out.
CW " thou must eat what I prepare for thee"
Groome leaps out of bed knocking Catweazle's vinyl chips on the floor, and runs out and sees Cedric, he holds door shut.
Cd " what's the matter?"
Groome tries but can't speak, he indicates Cedric to come and hold door, Cedric does as Groome runs to drawer and takes out notepad and writes. He and Cedric swap, Groome holding door, Cedric reading note.
Cd " help there's a madman, what in there?"
Groome nods, then beckons Cedric over, they swap again, Cedric holds door Groome writes more, then swap back, Cedric reads note,
Cd " I'll get his Lordship....oh er couldn't we just let him go? I couldn't hold the door."
Again they swap places, Groome opens drawer again and produces key, Cedric lets go of door as Groome locks it.

Meanwhile Dotty is with Dr Hawkins outside the main entrance,
LyC " can't think how you missed Cedric."
DrH " never mind Lady Collingford, the gatehouse you say?"
LyC " yes you passed it, at end of the drive."
Groome meanwhile has got his coat on over his pyjamas, bicycle clips on and runs out of lodge and onto his bike and pedals towards house.

Lord Collingford comes round the corner of King's Farthing still practicing his guidance of visitors for tomorrow.
LC ( to no one) " do keep up as a group makes it easier for me. Up The steps and here we come to the pistol collection ( stops by cannon) er, this is a cannon, last fired at the battle of St Vincent in eighteen hundred and ...er eighteen hundred and...whenever the battle of St Vincent was."
Doctor Hawkins stares puzzled as to what is going on,
LyC " my husband.....excuse me."
Dotty follows Charles as he walks off chatting to himself. Mrs Gowdy approaches the doc,
MG " he can be very difficult doctor."
DrH " Lord Collingford?"
MG " certainly not! I meant Mr Groome."
DrH " of course."
Dr Hawkins smiles weakly and gets back in his car.

 

Cedric angrily enters bedroom to see Catweazle picking up his vinyl chips from the carpet.
Cd " now look what you've done, of all the crazy ideas. You better disappear."
CW " disappear?"
Cd " come on"
Cedric pushes Catweazle out of bedroom.

Groome pedalling up to house passes Dr Hawkins in his car.

CW " he would not take the voice."
Cd " I don't blame him, now come on"
Someone is heard entering lodge,
Cd " too late, hide."
Catweazle is pushed back into bedroom.

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

Dr Hawkins enters,
DrH " Cedric isn't it?"
Cd " yes"
DrH " you been holding the Fort?"
Cd " yes"
DrH " in here?"
Cedric reluctantly nods, the doc enters bedroom.
Catweazle is in bed hiding under blanket.
DrH " good afternoon Mr Groome, feeling better? Now do come out there's a good chap."
Catweazle remains hidden,
DrH " I can't do anything to help you unless I can see you can I? ( losing patience) I've a lot of other people to see you know, you're behaving very badly."

Mrs Gowdy watering the flowerpots outside house astonished as Groome leaps off bike and runs up.
MG " Henry, what are you doing out of bed?"
Groome mouthing and pointing runs into house.
At lodge,
DrH ( shouts) " will you come out!"
Catweazle pulls down sheets,
DrH " I'm just going to take your pulse, give me your hand."
Catweazle does this, the doctor tries to take pulse, Catweazle grabs his hand the doctor tries something else.
DrH " sit up, and put this under your tongue"
Catweazle takes thermometer, puts it horizontally between lips, the doctor correctly places thermometer under tongue then Catweazle spits it out.

In drawing room Groome is writing again on a pad, he hands it to Mrs Gowdy.
MG ( reading) " he tried to make me eat a gramophone record! Now don't go away Henry, stay calm I'll be back"
Groome realises Mavis thinks he's gone potty.

 

Back at the lodge,
DrH " open wide again, don't worry I'm not going to put anything in it."
Catweazle refuses to open mouth, so Dr Hawkins forcibly squeezes on Catweazle's nose, making him open mouth, then looks inside.

DrH " hhmm..looks fairly normal"
Hawkins gets out his stethoscope,
DrH " I don't think you should wear your dressing gown in bed"
He starts a chest examination, and his stethoscope knocks against something around Catweazle's chest area, Hawkins opens robe to see Adamcos, the witch knife, he hurriedly closes robe.
DrH "what an earth!!"

Dotty comes into drawing room with Mrs Gowdy,
LyC " hello Mr Groome, now what was it the doctor wanted you to eat?"
Groome passes her the note, Dotty reads it looking incredulous.

Dotty and Mavis whisper out of earshot of Groome.
LyC " I can't find my husband anywhere"
MG " what about Doctor Hawkins?"
LyC " you go and see, I'll manage here."
Mavis leaves, Dotty puts a reassuring hand on Groome's shoulder,
LyC " there there"
Mrs Gowdy gets on Groome's bike and pedals off to lodge.
Inside lodge,
DrH " now then I'm going to give you a little injection.....arm please."
Catweazle sees the needle and reacts in terror,
CW " AARRGGHH! YOU SHALL NOT PRRICK ME I AM NO WITCH LEAVE ME BE"
DrH " you can talk!?"
Catweazle leaps out of bed, jostles with the doctor ,kicks him and runs out.
CW " THOU SHALL NOT P RICK ME"
Outside he jumps on his tricycle and rides off, Hawkins rattled in the extreme runs out as Mrs Gowdy turns up, Cedric looks innocently on, shrugs, he knows nothing.
MG " are you alright doctor?"
DrH " yes I think so"
MG " did he attack you?"
DrH " well there was a struggle, I don't think there's anything more I can do, goodbye."

Groome is busy writing more notes ,
LyC " I wish you didn't write anymore, just relax"
Gr " I TELL YOU I'M PERFECTLY SANE"
LyC " Groome!?"
Gr " my voice, it's come back"
Charles enters,
LyC " Charles his voice is back isn't that marvellous"
Gr ( happy) " lalala it's back!"
Charles writes a note, hands it to Dotty.
LyC " Charles!? ( reads) oh no!"
Charles points to his mouth,
LC ( mouths) " oh yes."

Cedric and Catweazle are sitting on the platform at Duck Halt,
Cd " you're still the mystery man, you're still a mystery to me as well."
CW " I swore to help thee my brother."
Cd " you got it a bit mixed up."
CW " nay"
Cd " just this once"
CW ( shakes head) " your magic is too hard for me"
Cd " you think so, never mind, where are your records?"
Catweazle picks up his " book" of records.
Cedric opens it, and pulls out record from first sleeve. Catweazle agitated points to disc,
CW " see see"
The center of the record has a lion picture on it.

Cd " oh an old lion label, don't see many of them today."
CW ( tapping record) " see the lion, the sign is revealed, I have another sign."
Cd " careful don't break it, let's play it shall we?"
CW " aye"
Cedric places disc on his turntable he brought here, brass jazzy music is heard.
Catweazle stands and pulls Cedric to his feet, charmingly the two dance a little jig.

Cast;
Cedric......Gary Warren
Catweazle....Geoffrey Bayldon
Lord Collingford.....Moray Watson
Lady Collingford....Elspet Gray
Groome.....Peter Butterworth
Mavis Gowdy......Gwen Nelson
Dr Hawkins......Johnathan Elsom

 

EPISODE 6 POSTED ABOVE  NEXT EPISODE 7

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

S2 E7 -THE ENCHANTED KING

In King's Farthing the home of the Collingfords, Lord Collingford (Charles) is having problems with the TV set. He and handyman Groome are in the tv room trying to get it working, there's sound but no picture.
G " I don't know what you've done to it my Lord"
LC " I haven't done anything to it Mr Groome "
Charles raps top of tv with knuckles, the sound stops.
G " you have now...the sounds gone , you need a proper qualified engineer for this"
LC " then I'll miss the match, isn't there anything you can do?"
G " these things don't last forever my Lord, not without very careful maintainening " (sic)
LC " are you suggesting we oil it?"
G " oil it?!..no no ( head in hands)..I'm suggesting we leave it to warm up while the children's programmes are on"
LC " very well Groome we'll do that. Is that sculpture chappie still here?"
G " think so my Lord"
Moray Watson and Peter Butterworth are Charles and Groome.

In the drawing room John Gobbling, sculpture extraordinaire is showing Lady Collingford, Dotty photos of his work, an array of photos litter the floor.

Gb " ah, here's my creation of man"
Gobbling hands Dotty photo.
LyC " goodness me"
Gb " reinforced concrete 25 feet high, what do you think of that "
LyC " very powerful " ( hands photo back)
Gb " I worked much bigger in those days of course. The piece you are unveiling today is only life size"
LyC " I'm sure it will be quite big enough for me Mr Gobbling "
Elspet Gray and Graham Crowden are Dotty and Gobbling.

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

In Duck Halt, the disused railway station that is home to Catweazle, he is putting ingredients into a fire in a cauldron while calling on the spirits.
C " come infernal, terrestrial, and celestial demons. Come O Mobus, come O Miribus, come O Glaziabalos. Servants of the zodiac, spirits of the brazen vessel show thyselves, lead me to the sign of the balances."
No answer from the spirits.
C " nothing works....mayhap Owlface will lead me to the sign "
Geoffrey Bayldon is Catweazle.

Back at King's Farthing.
Charles enters,
LyC " ah..my husband "
Gb " Lord Collingford "
LC " how do you do"
LyC " Mr Gobbling has been showing me photographs of some of his work Charles"
LC " oh..er yes"
Gb "let me show you Hercules, Bogota railway terminus 1950"
Gobbling hands Charles photo who looks at photo sort of lost for words.
LC " erm...interesting."

Catweazle enters the hallway at King's Farthing, quietly whispers,
C " Owlface...Owlface?"
Cedric isn't around, Catweazle creeps down a corridor and into tv room, where the television is on but still with no sound or picture. Suddenly though there is both, a voice is heard,
" stop I command thee"
Catweazle spins round locating voice, a jackanory type program is on, a man sitting telling a story to viewers, of course Catweazle thinking it's real.
Storyteller " there was a long pause while the wizard looked carefully around. Nobody dared move, you are in my power said the wizard"
Catweazle throws himself to floor kneeling in front of tv.
C " art thou a demon?"
Storyteller " and I shall turn you into stone"
C " mercy I beg thee!"
Storyteller " slowly the King, Queen and all the courtiers turned into stone. Then without another word the wizard vanished. What now, how can the spell be broken and the King set free?"
C " I know not O demon "
Storyteller " ...and the evil wizard punished "
C" where does he live?"
Storyteller " can you guess?"
C " nay tell me O demon "
Storyteller " tomorrow I will be here again"
The picture fades, only static is heard.
C " come back O demon, not on the morrow tell me now. (rapping knuckles on tv set top) come back O demon, come out of thy house. I know that you are in there O demon"
Catweazle knocking on the set top changes channels, a train hooting as it roars along is heard.
C "AAARRGGHH...." He runs out.

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

Catweazle runs into the hall and sees Cedric.
Cd " Catweazle what are you doing here?"
Catweazle looks to get out the front door, but Groome is on the motorised lawnmower.
Cd " quick that way...come on"
They run off to get to the side entrance. They pass the drawing room, Cedric motions Catweazle to stay quiet, inside Gobbling is still with Charles and Dotty.
Gb " stone is so permanent you see, if I turned you into stone you'd last 1000 years.
I could turn your whole family into stone if you like"
LC " no no really"
Gb ( laughs) " well not all of you then just your heads"
Catweazle shocked, it must be the wizard turning people to stone.
Cd " come on"
They hide as Charles, Dotty and Gobbling come out of the room and go towards the hall.
Gb " see you at the town hall Lady Collingford "
LyC " Groome will pick you up at 3"
Catweazle ,face of anger as he sees them walk off.
C " tis he?!"
Cd " Mr Gobbling "
C " tis no goblin tis the wizard, I will lay a curse on him"
Cd " why?!"
C " if I destroy his power thy demon will lead me to the sign of the balances "
Cd " for goodness sake Catweazle, go back to Duck Halt and have a lie down"
Cedric opens side door and pushes Catweazle out, locks door as Charles and Dotty return.
LC " I thought he'd never go "
LyC " so did I "
L " oh Cedric...what have you been up to?"
Cd " ....er nothing "
Gary Warren is Cedric.

Catweazle on his tricycle has followed Gobbling to his workshop, a cottage located on the outskirts of Elderford. In yard outside an example of Gobbling's work, a statue of a horse Catweazle nervous as he passes it and enters premises.

Various statues dot the workshop, most unfinished, all made from plaster of paris, no sign of Gobbling as Catweazle studies these strange surroundings.

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

The statue that Gobbling is working on is one of a King, statue half painted, a blue robe and yellow crown, Catweazle studies it sadly and whispers to statue.
C " fear not O King I am sent by a demon to set you free. I will soon release thee."

C " Shempamparash "
Catweazle disappointed as nothing happens,
C " once more be thy flesh and bone, breathe again and melt the stone"
Still nothing, he then dances around statue and in a melodic sing song voice repeats spell.
C " once more be thy flesh and bone breathe again and melt the stone"
Catweazle in despair, tries something else, Gobbling meanwhile has entered and is standing watching this.
C " nothing works.....( pointing) galbaze galbat, galdat!!! awake O King"
Gobbling grabs him by his robe,
Gb ( shouts) " WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE UP TO!?"

Charles and Dotty all dressed ready for the unveiling at the Town Hall , walk to vintage roadster where Groome opens the door for them.
LyC " I do hope I'm going to be alright, I feel very nervous "
LC " course you'll be alright Dotty darling"
Dotty gets in back of car, as Cedric suited up appears.
LC " ah here's Cedric "
Cd " do I really have to come?"
LC " course you do, your mother is making a speech"
They all get in and the car drives off.

Meanwhile at Gobbling's workshop Catweazle is hiding behind wooden boxes scared witless, making hissing noises.
C " ppsstt...ppsstt. "
Gb " this is ridiculous, what's the matter with you man come out"
C " nay you will turn me into stone"
Gb( shouts) I'LL WHAT!"
C " the demon told me in the demon box"
Gb" WHAT ARE YOU BABBLING ABOUT "
C (points) algar, telgar, tetragram"
Gb " COME OUT"
Gobbling grabs him by collar and hauls him to his feet "
Gb " WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE "
C ( simpering) " nothing O mighty one"
Gb " on the scrounge weren't you"
C " harm me not"
Gb " shouldn't think you've done a day's work in your life"
C " I beg...I beg "
Gb " yes I bet you do, begging is easy isn't it, as long as someone's fool enough to fall for it "
C " mercy"
Gb " don't worry I'll give you something only this time you'll have to work for it understand?"
C " aye"
Gb " see that broom"
C " aye O mighty one"
Gb " get it "
Catweazle gets broom and brings it to Gobbling.
Gb" sweep up"
C " up? "
Catweazle holds broom above head and makes a sweeping motion.
Gb " no you idiot, the floor"

Catweazle starts sweeping floor as Gobbling returns to work, Catweazle moves over to statue of King.
C " fear not O King I will release thee"
Gb " when you've swept up you can clean those buckets over there"
Gobbling goes over to King statue with palette with more plaster on it and continues working on statue.

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

The Collingfords have arrived at the Town Hall, a large building located by the edge of the woods that surround Elderford.

The mayor greets them,
My " Lady Collingford so nice to see you, and Lord Collingford welcome , the big moment has arrived "
Cd " Dad can I go with Mr Groome to pick up Mr Gobbling?"
LC " very well Cedric, don't be too long "

Back at Gobbling's Catweazle picks up something wrapped in newspaper, he unwraps it to reveal a plaster cast hand.
C " urgh "
He throws it on floor, Gobbling SHOUTS a lot.
Gb " YOU GREAT OAF"
Gobbling picks up hand, now missing a finger,
Gb " YOU'VE RUINED IT...GET THE STEPS"
Catweazle puzzled, Gobbling ballistic,
Gb " THE STEPS "
Catweazle sees step ladder against wall, he picks it up and walks towards Gobbling.
Gb " LOOK OUT"
Catweazle manoeuvres the steps to avoid knocking into a statue, but bashes Gobbling who falls to floor, emptying palette of plaster all over himself.
C " pardon O mighty one"
Gb " FOOL"

Groome and Cedric arrive in the car,
G " well we're here "
Cd " yes"
Groome gets out and walks towards Gobbling's workshop.

Inside Gobbling is holding bucket of plaster, puts his hand in and takes out a handful of wet plaster.
Gb " where are you....you maniac I'll fix you"
Catweazle hiding again, Gobbling sees him and flings plaster, landing on Catweazle's robe.
C ( looking in horror)" no not stone, not into stone " He runs towards door
Gobbling takes aim with whole bucket and hurls contents in Catweazle's direction, but misses as Catweazle ducks, the whole lot ends up all over Groome standing in doorway.

Gb " who are you?"
Groome tries to wipe plaster off face.
G " Groome...come to pick you up "
Gb " stay there don't move there's a maniac on the loose. ( hands him fresh bucket of plaster) Take this"
Catweazle backs away from Gobbling, dodges him and runs to door.
Gb " NOW..LET HIM HAVE IT"
Groome hurls contents in Catweazle's direction, again he ducks, this time Gobbling gets the lot over him. Catweazle panicking backs into a shelf , shelf collapses , an opened bag of dry plaster powder tips over him.

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

Catweazle runs out, Cedric astonished to see him.
Cd " Catweazle?"
C " the wizard...the wizard..hide me"
Cedric opens car boot, Catweazle climbs in.
Gobbling and Groome run out,
Gb " where did he go?"
Cd " who?"
Gb " WHERE ARE YOU, I'LL TEAR YOU TO PIECES...he's hiding somewhere the old devil"
Groome angry with plaster all over him.
G " just wait till her Ladyship hears about this"
Gb " AARRGGHH the unveiling "
Cd " you're not going to go like that"
Gb " oh god no....hang on a minute "
Gobbling runs back inside.

G " these artists are all like this, raving manics the lot of them "
Cd " hadn't you better remove your coat"
Groome gingerly removes his muck covered chauffeurs coat.
G " did you see him?"
Cd " who ?"
G " him...him, he must have come this way"
Cd " no I didn't see anyone "
Gobbling comes back out, looking slightly better, they all clamber into car.

On the lawn outside Town Hall, dignitaries are enjoying wine, champagne and food ahead of the unveiling.
LyC " can't think where they've got to, Charles do you think something dreadful could have happened "
LC " don't worry Dotty darling, they'll be here "
The mayor comes up,
My " we must start in a minute "
The car arrives,
LC " there they are"
My " this way Lady Collingford "
The mayor guides Dotty to the rostrum for her speech.
Gobbling gets out of car, and hurries up to gathering on lawn outside Town Hall.
Cedric reluctant to go,
G " go on up"
Cd " do I have to"
G " yes, now go on"
Richard Caldicot is the Mayor.

The Mayor addresses the audience, Cedric seated next to Gobbling near the back. Charles and Dotty up on stage seated behind the Mayor.
My " my Lord ladies and gentlemen, as you know we are here today for the unveiling of the statue of ..er...er.."( consulting notes)
LyC " Phoebe "
My " yes thank you, Phoebe, the work of John Gobbling who we are proud to welcome here this afternoon "
Audience clap, Gobbling rises from seat to take applause.

Meanwhile Catweazle has clambered out of car boot and is running, keeping low, around the unveiling gathering .
The Mayor continues, " so it gives me great pleasure to introduce Lady Collingford and ask her to perform the unveiling ceremony"
Groome standing at the back notices Catweazle crouching down at the edge of the gathering and he sets off silently in pursuit. Catweazle is now at rear of gathering behind the curtains that when opened will reveal the statue, he gasps in awe. The statue is a female, holding a balancing scales, the scales themselves not part of the carving but are real metal scales hooked over the statue's outstretched arms.

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

Dotty starts her speech,
LyC " Mr Mayor, ladies and gentlemen it is indeed an honour for me to unveil this beautiful statue. As you all know Mr Gobbling's reputation is international and we are all proud he is a citizen of Elderford. It is indeed a worthy addition to the existing sculpture and will serve to remind us of the cradle of European civilization "
Suddenly a loud crash can be heard from behind curtain.
Dotty pulls cord to open curtains,
LyC " better known to us all as justice, long may she hold sway"

The curtains open , the statue has toppled over, Catweazle standing on plinth holding scales, and of course covered head to toe in plastering powder.

Groome behind,
G " it's him!"
Gobbling stands,
Gb " IT'S THE MANIAC I'LL KILL HIM"
Gobbling runs forward, both he and Groome make a grab at Catweazle.
The three wrestle on the stage, the curtains and supporting frame collapses, punches thrown, Catweazle wriggles out from under the curtains covering all three of them, and stands and runs off into woods. Gobbling and Groome standing now, pull the curtains off of themselves,
Gb " WHERE IS THAT LUNATIC?"
But Catweazle is gone.

Back at Duck Halt the next day, Catweazle lying on platform of disused station, the balance scales next to him.

Cedric is reading from local newspaper.
Cd ( reads) " mystery man ko's justice, rag students deny all knowledge "
C " the sign of the balances, my powers grow stronger "
Cd " Catweazle what am I going to do with you?"
C " it was thy demon that led me to it"
Cd " I haven't got a demon "
C " yes you have in thy demon box"
Cd " what demon box?"
Catweazle makes a square pattern with his finger in the air, the square around his head.
Cd " oh you mean the television set "
C " nay, thy demon box , if only I had one"
Cd " you wouldn't get much magic done then would you"
Cedric reads his paper, Catweazle opens his magic book of spells. Cedric glances over,
Cd " could you teach me to read that?"
C ( smiles) " aye..if thy will teach me thy writing"
Cd " okay, it's about time "
C ( in awe) " about time?"
Cd " no I mean....never mind."
C " I will learn thy magic "
Cd " and I will learn yours "
Cedric offers hand, they shake hands.
Cd " a deal"

THE END

Edited March 19 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

S2 E8 - THE FAMILIAR SPIRIT

In Duck Halt the disused railway station that is his home Catweazle is upset. His toad Touchwood is unwell. The animal's skin is an off colour, and dry , Catweazle places toad on his palm saying,
C " oh sickness rise up, fly away , hide behind the moon, go from Touchwood. Ammo Ablammo salmy Dalmy Adonay."
Catweazle is clearly upset,
C " nothing works, I will not leave thee, I will not fly without thee. Thy skin is like parchment, but fear not thou shall be strong again "
Cedric enters,
Cd " morning Catweazle"
C " Touchwood is sick, magic cannot cure him"
Cd " what's wrong with him?"
C " see, his skin, he will not eat his blue bottle"
CD " gosh, he must be ill"
C " mayhap he is bewitched "
CD " don't be silly, he's just a bit off colour that's all"
C " aye he hath a yellow look "
CD " maybe it's jaundice , I wish I knew more about toads "
C " I could find him leeches"
CD " don't be silly he might eat them"
C " what is a magician without his familiar, how will I find the sign of the scorpion, how will I fly. Without Touchwood I am lost"
CD " don't be silly he'll be fine, you talk as if he's had it"
C " had what?"
CD " could take him to a vet I suppose, wait a minute, there's a zoologist in Elderford...now what's his name...er..ah Professor Habbleman"
Geoffrey Bayldon is Catweazle, Gary Warren is Cedric.

 

In Professor Oscar Habbleman's house in the nearby Elderford , the professor is at a typewriter, reading out what he has just typed. He has a strong German accent.
Oscar " therefore we must assume that this species may have been extinct for some time past "
The main living room of his house is more like a laboratory. Glass cases with toads in them, toad pictures on the wall, a bunsen burner alight with a glass flask on top of it with bluish liquid bubbling away.

Nearby Cedric and Catweazle walk down the road, Catweazle in a trilby and raincoat, an attempt by Cedric to make Catweazle look normal. Catweazle starts to cross road, until Cedric pulls him back.
CD " hey look both ways"
Catweazle looks straight ahead then behind him.
CD " no look right left and right again "
C " what sayest thou?"
CD " like this, you do what I do, right left and now right again. Now cross"
Catweazle crosses fingers.
CD " no the road you idiot "
Catweazle bends down and makes the sign of the cross on the road.
CD " oh no..come on "
They cross Catweazle carrying Wellington boot with Touchwood inside it.
John Ringham is Oscar Habbleman.

Edited March 21 by HawkMan

[HawkMan]

Oscar Habbleman picks up phone, in a country house outside of Elderford the call is received. A woman in her 50's picks up phone.
H " hello"
Osc " Hanna, I want to speak to Otto"
H " just a minute Oscar I'll call him.....(shouts)...Otto "
Otto comes out of room to hallway to phone, classical music is blaring out.
Otto " I'm not deaf Hanna there's no need to shout."
Otto Habbleman is an identical twin to Oscar.
Otto ( phone) " who is that please?"
Osc " Oscar...listen Otto"
Otto " just a minute Oscar, Hanna please turn the radio down "
The music is still loud.
Osc " we cannot be sure"
Otto " what did you say Oscar?"
Osc " I said we cannot be sure"
Otto " what about?"
Osc " I can't hear you Otto"
Otto " just a minute Oscar....Hanna turn the radio off please"
Oscar has had enough,
Osc " I'll ring again" , (putting phone down)
The radio is now off at Otto's,
Otto " that's better, Oscar...are you there?"
Hanna, Otto's wife comes to phone.
H " is it alright?"
Otto " alright..? See what you have done, he's hung up on me"
John Ringham is Otto and Hana-Marie Pravda is Hanna.

Cedric and Catweazle arrive at Oscar's ,
CD " don't forget if he asks you who you are, you're a visitor from overseas "
C " I swear by adamcos"
CD " let me do the talking okay"
C ( curtly) " okay...okay"
Cedric rings doorbell, Oscar opens door, he is immediately fixated on Catweazle.
Osc " oh...Ceedric how are you"
CD " it's Cedric, I'm fine thanks "
Osc " and your father"( looking at Catweazle)
CD " no he's...oh I see he's fine as well thanks "
Osc " and who are you?"
C " Catw......a visitor from overseas "
Osc " why are you carrying that boot?"
C " it's Touchwood "
CD " he's ill"
Osc " is he?"
Cd " yes he wouldn't eat his blue bottle this morning "
Osc " well ...er I don't think your friend should "
C ( offering boot to Oscar)" it's all I have"
Osc " I don't want it, I have a pair "
Cd " it's a toad "
Osc " a toad! Where?"
CD " in the boot"
All three peer into the boot.
Osc " I don't see anything "
CD " perhaps he's round the bend...in the toe"
Osc ( looking)" oh yes, I see him, what is wrong with him?"
CD " we don't know that is why we've come to you"
Osc " very wise of you, then you're acquainted with my work?"
CD " oh er..yes of course"
Osc " strange, no one else is, you better come in (viewing Catweazle suspiciously)
both of you "

Edited March 21 by HawkMan