Old Frightful

Shamelessly pinched off Facebook : Last night I was out for a few drinks and a meal. One thing lead to another and I had a few too many beers and then went onto the wine, finishing with some brandy. Not a good idea. Knowing I was over the limit, I decided to leave my car and took a bus home. Sure enough, I passed a police checkpoint, where they were pulling over drivers and performing breathalyser tests. Because I was in a bus they just waved it past. I arrived home safely and without incident, which was a real surprise as I’ve never driven a bus before and I am not even sure where I got it from. Now it’s parked outside my house and I don’t know what to do with it!

I saw a bloke with a black cape sprinting down my street. I asked "Wow, are you some kind of superhero?" He replied "No, I haven't paid for my f***ing haircut".

The manager of John O'Groat's FC has quit after a defeat by Lands End FC. He said he's taken the team as far as they can go.

Sodding hell....one for the "Alive but you thought they'd croaked" thread!

Friends who I haven't seen for a while asking me if I'm retired yet?!?! My reply usually ends in off.

With apologies to Saints fans...

I've just watched the highlights and was rather taken aback when Aispuro-Bichet was taking a conversion from the touchline and the half time hooter sounded just as he was in the run up to kick it. Was that a bit of gamesmanship from the Toulouse outfit? Never seen that before in all my years of watching RL. I wonder if Catalans would have asked to take the kick again had he missed it.

Vera Lynn perhaps?

The plumber’s ring?

That has Derek Beaumont’s influence all over it, rather sadly.

Ref is losing control of this which is a shame as it’s an excellent contest.

Absolutely nothing wrong with Charnley’s tackle then, ridiculous.

The BBC presentation is a bit disappointing when you know what’s going to happen before it appears on the screen because the crowd lets you know first.

This is a belting game! It’s just like watching Hull FC…. Oh sorry, as you were…

I bet Jagger was surprised to be playing opposite Wood this afternoon...