Adelaide Tiger Posted November 1, 2022 Share Posted November 1, 2022 Not a joke but I found this funny. Today was the Melbourne Cup horse race - the race that allegedly stops the nation- and after the race the presenter on ABC National Radio spoke to some bloke called Ian from the Northern Territory. Ian had just organised a saltwater crocodile race day for the same day. The crocs were about 1.6m long and ‘hired’ from a local farm. Ian said that they had held three races. The presenter asked Ian what were the names of the winning crocs. I can’t remember the names of the first two winners but Ian said that the winner of the third race was Croc Sucker! It must have gone over the presenters head as he just prattled on. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Hallucinating Goose Posted November 1, 2022 Share Posted November 1, 2022 2 hours ago, Adelaide Tiger said: Not a joke but I found this funny. Today was the Melbourne Cup horse race - the race that allegedly stops the nation- and after the race the presenter on ABC National Radio spoke to some bloke called Ian from the Northern Territory. Ian had just organised a saltwater crocodile race day for the same day. The crocs were about 1.6m long and ‘hired’ from a local farm. Ian said that they had held three races. The presenter asked Ian what were the names of the winning crocs. I can’t remember the names of the first two winners but Ian said that the winner of the third race was Croc Sucker! It must have gone over the presenters head as he just prattled on. Crocodile racing! My kind of sport! Is there any footage of this out there?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DavidM Posted November 1, 2022 Share Posted November 1, 2022 2 hours ago, Adelaide Tiger said: Not a joke but I found this funny. Today was the Melbourne Cup horse race - the race that allegedly stops the nation- and after the race the presenter on ABC National Radio spoke to some bloke called Ian from the Northern Territory. Ian had just organised a saltwater crocodile race day for the same day. The crocs were about 1.6m long and ‘hired’ from a local farm. Ian said that they had held three races. The presenter asked Ian what were the names of the winning crocs. I can’t remember the names of the first two winners but Ian said that the winner of the third race was Croc Sucker! It must have gone over the presenters head as he just prattled on. Brave jockeys 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bearman Posted November 1, 2022 Share Posted November 1, 2022 Reminds me the story of the guy that entered his pet into a dog fight. The organiser asked " what breed is that" " A long nosed long tailed short legged terrier" came the reply. " Mind you some people call them crocodiles" 1 Ron Banks Midlands Hurricanes and Barrow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Futtocks Posted November 1, 2022 Author Share Posted November 1, 2022 6 hours ago, The Hallucinating Goose said: Crocodile racing! My kind of sport! Is there any footage of this out there?? Not only is there footage, but our Antipodean cousins have applied all their sophisticated wit to the naming of the competitors. https://www.ntnews.com.au/news/northern-territory/2021-croc-races-at-berry-springs-tavern/video/fefa776dad4191e3a1bbb5acf4203def 1 Let me never fall into the vulgar mistake of dreaming that I am persecuted whenever I am contradicted. Ralph Waldo Emerson Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiltshire Warrior Dragon Posted November 1, 2022 Share Posted November 1, 2022 A nurse told me that the biggest threat facing the NHS is 'Holby City'; actually, she might have said 'obesity'! OK, I admit it. My daughter and I saw Milton Jones in Winchester on Sunday evening. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Hallucinating Goose Posted November 1, 2022 Share Posted November 1, 2022 1 hour ago, Futtocks said: Not only is there footage, but our Antipodean cousins have applied all their sophisticated wit to the naming of the competitors. https://www.ntnews.com.au/news/northern-territory/2021-croc-races-at-berry-springs-tavern/video/fefa776dad4191e3a1bbb5acf4203def Brilliant! Fast little beggers aren't they?! Without a doubt my new favourite sport because if there's one thing rugby league doesn't have its massive, slippery lizards! ....oh wait. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
graveyard johnny Posted November 2, 2022 Share Posted November 2, 2022 (edited) 20 hours ago, Futtocks said: Not only is there footage, but our Antipodean cousins have applied all their sophisticated wit to the naming of the competitors. https://www.ntnews.com.au/news/northern-territory/2021-croc-races-at-berry-springs-tavern/video/fefa776dad4191e3a1bbb5acf4203def nothing like a good old laugh at the expense of god's creatures is there? - more animal exploitation antics in the name of entertainment - poor things were probably scared witless- Aren't the human race a lovely lot? now a crocodile wrestling with Jamie Oliver would be a different story Edited November 2, 2022 by graveyard johnny see you later undertaker - in a while necrophile Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stirlin Posted November 6, 2022 Share Posted November 6, 2022 Fool your neighbours into thinking you're giving your wife an orgasm by flushing the downstairs bog whilst she's upstairs taking a shower... 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Futtocks Posted November 6, 2022 Author Share Posted November 6, 2022 Let me never fall into the vulgar mistake of dreaming that I am persecuted whenever I am contradicted. Ralph Waldo Emerson Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Hallucinating Goose Posted November 8, 2022 Share Posted November 8, 2022 I've been watching a lot of Zombie movies recently so I'm prepared in case it happens for real. Same reason I watch so much porn... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bearman Posted November 10, 2022 Share Posted November 10, 2022 (edited) The bloke who invented auto correct died yesterday, His funfair is next monkey Edited November 11, 2022 by Bearman 2 2 Ron Banks Midlands Hurricanes and Barrow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Hallucinating Goose Posted November 11, 2022 Share Posted November 11, 2022 I have recently developed a fear of over engineered buildings. It's a complex complex complex. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bearman Posted November 15, 2022 Share Posted November 15, 2022 Good news guys !!!!! As you get older your John Thomas grows in size. ITS TRUE I can prove it. When I was 20 in the 60's my old man was the size of a Mars bar Now I'm in my 70's it's twice as big as one 2 Ron Banks Midlands Hurricanes and Barrow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Futtocks Posted November 16, 2022 Author Share Posted November 16, 2022 Let me never fall into the vulgar mistake of dreaming that I am persecuted whenever I am contradicted. Ralph Waldo Emerson Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bedfordshire Bronco Posted November 16, 2022 Share Posted November 16, 2022 On 06/11/2022 at 16:43, Stirlin said: Fool your neighbours into thinking you're giving your wife an orgasm by flushing the downstairs bog whilst she's upstairs taking a shower... That's got Viz top tips written all over it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stirlin Posted November 16, 2022 Share Posted November 16, 2022 Just now, Bedfordshire Bronco said: That's got Viz top tips written all over it Aye. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Frightful Posted November 20, 2022 Share Posted November 20, 2022 1 Hull FC....The Sons of God.... (Well, we are about to be crucified on Good Friday) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RayCee Posted November 20, 2022 Share Posted November 20, 2022 I'm always right. I always agree with my wife. My blog: https://rugbyl.blogspot.co.nz/ It takes wisdom to know when a discussion has run its course. It takes reasonableness to end that discussion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Number 16 Posted November 21, 2022 Share Posted November 21, 2022 A man in the pub asked me to name three Qatar players. I said Jimi Hendrix, Jimmy Page and George Harrison. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Frightful Posted November 22, 2022 Share Posted November 22, 2022 2 Hull FC....The Sons of God.... (Well, we are about to be crucified on Good Friday) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stirlin Posted November 29, 2022 Share Posted November 29, 2022 https://www.facebook.com/watch/?ref=external&v=1549731758877485 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnM Posted November 30, 2022 Share Posted November 30, 2022 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stirlin Posted December 6, 2022 Share Posted December 6, 2022 Members of the RMT, Post Office workers and ambulance service staff have voted unanimously to walk out-out and go on strike-strike after a ballot was taken criticising the poor conditions they have to endure on picket line duty. Charlie Endbell who was on strike supporting the RMT was quoted as saying, "The conditions on the picket lines are bleedin' awful. There's no wi-fi, we have to sit on upturned buckets in front of a smokey fire in an oil drum, the nearest betting office is a mile away and our Costa Coffee ordered via Deliveroo always arrives bloody cold. We've missed all the football and there's no place to charge our I-phones. We have no choice but to go on a further strike-strike until our pitiful picketing conditions are improved. All we ask for is a Winnebago RV for each picket line, access to decent wi-fi and taxis to and from Bet Fred and Costa Coffee and perhaps the British Army could come out with a mobile field kitchen and a decent celebrity chef to keep us fed during these cold months.....it's hard work being a picket so until our conditions are vastly improved, we're all out-out on strike-strike" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DavidM Posted December 13, 2022 Share Posted December 13, 2022 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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